The Can Do Coffee Chat with Sita McKee, a Founder and CEO of You're Valued LTD, Health and Wellness Consultant & Boldness Coach

[00:00:00] Ate a Pro Studios Hi, I'm Gal Gibson, accredited master performance

[00:00:11] coach, international speaker, podcast host and author.

[00:00:17] Known as The Can Do Coach, I thrive on enabling leaders to step up, shake it off and shine.

[00:00:25] Welcome to my podcast The Can Do Way.

[00:00:28] My guests from across the globe have Can Do stories of growth, resilience and success

[00:00:33] to share.

[00:00:35] Tune in and be inspired by these individuals who have developed a strong Can Do approach.

[00:00:41] Each one of their stories is unique.

[00:00:44] Each one of their stories has a key message.

[00:00:49] In this episode of The Can Do Way I'm delighted to be talking to founder and CEO of your

[00:00:55] valued limited health and wellness consultant and boldness coach, Ceta McKee.

[00:01:02] Inspired by conversations about holistic wellness with her father, Ceta is passionate about

[00:01:08] enabling mental wellness in people.

[00:01:12] Working in the health and social care sector, so Ceta helped and empower her clients to

[00:01:17] live a life of wellness.

[00:01:20] Now as a boldness coach, Ceta uses her skills, knowledge and compassionate nature to support

[00:01:26] clients on their wellbeing journey from burnout to boldness.

[00:01:32] Welcome to the show today, Ceta.

[00:01:34] Thank you so much, Gille, for having me.

[00:01:36] Thank you.

[00:01:37] We can take a short walk through your life if you can just give the listeners a glimpse

[00:01:42] of your background and what it is that drives your passion for the work that you deliver

[00:01:47] today.

[00:01:49] I don't know where to start really because it's so much from going to try and keep you

[00:01:53] really short, but I think you've said majority of it in the intro.

[00:01:59] So my journey started 20 years ago, having conversations with my dad and just didn't really

[00:02:08] realize that I had a passion for it until...

[00:02:12] And I think that's the way it usually is, isn't it?

[00:02:14] Until the person is no more and you start reminiscing about the conversations you've

[00:02:19] had, and you realize that oh my goodness, I'm quite similar to this person.

[00:02:24] And I just had to pursue that passion in me that I didn't know I really had and also

[00:02:30] listening to conversations or views or feedback from friends and family about who I am because

[00:02:39] I tend to ask Christians, how do you think I handled that situation?

[00:02:44] So checking in with friends and family, gaining their feedback and then using that to help

[00:02:51] me live the way I want to live.

[00:02:54] So asking those questions and listening to their feedback it was like, naturally, that

[00:03:00] is my talent.

[00:03:02] And I have this gift of educating empowering people, encouraging people and nibbling

[00:03:09] them.

[00:03:10] So while I'm just sitting back and not really pushing and achieving my potential to really

[00:03:16] help others, and what really makes me happy is when I'm able to help somebody problem

[00:03:22] solve and achieve their potential it's just like, I can't put money to evaluate on that

[00:03:29] because it just excites me so much and I just want to carry on doing more and has my

[00:03:35] nurse in career, bringing that wellness to people and wanting a professional business or

[00:03:45] a company where I have the freedom to explore more and be more if you like bold with my

[00:03:52] clients and nibble them and empower them to achieve more.

[00:03:57] Beautiful, beautiful.

[00:03:59] And I can hear it in your voice, you know, I share that same sentiment with you where

[00:04:05] you said there's no words that can describe and no monetary value when you see a client

[00:04:09] who achieves and they, there's so much joy in them and everything just fits in place.

[00:04:17] It's like all those puzzle pieces connect and yes, some that person and I can hear and

[00:04:23] see that in you, it's that joy, that inner, it's that inner reward for us as coaches isn't

[00:04:29] it?

[00:04:30] That brings out that we love what we're doing and that empowers other people to go, I'm

[00:04:36] on a piece of that too.

[00:04:37] It's very infectious isn't it?

[00:04:39] In a positive way.

[00:04:40] Yeah.

[00:04:41] Yeah.

[00:04:42] So you talk about your dad in your introduction, Cedar and you said that he was somebody

[00:04:48] who you were very inspired by.

[00:04:51] So would you consider that he was your first champion in your life?

[00:04:55] Definitely, definitely.

[00:04:58] I mean, I think he built the foundation for me without it getting me real ice until later

[00:05:04] in life.

[00:05:05] I remember a situation where in my early primary school days perhaps, I don't want to

[00:05:15] say I was bullied but he's the lot in school because I'm naturally a small person, you

[00:05:23] know?

[00:05:24] And I remember going home to him and saying, you know, I get to use the school that I'm

[00:05:29] so tiny and all that.

[00:05:31] And he said, do you realize that good things come in small packages?

[00:05:35] And that just hasn't left me.

[00:05:39] So anytime I'm having a challenge or if there's ever a doubt about boldness, I'm like good

[00:05:46] things coming small packages.

[00:05:48] You know, therefore I am necessary.

[00:05:51] I am matter.

[00:05:52] I am here to do a job.

[00:05:54] I have a God-given talent or gift where I need to be able to help others with it and

[00:06:01] I need that boldness.

[00:06:02] And perhaps God is not going to look for a glider.

[00:06:05] He needs David to do his job, you know?

[00:06:10] So I just embrace my size.

[00:06:12] I embrace my boldness and encapsulated in the small size.

[00:06:16] You know?

[00:06:17] And yeah.

[00:06:18] So I would say my dad definitely was my champion.

[00:06:22] Fantastic.

[00:06:23] He obviously encouraged you and you said he very much inspired you through those conversations.

[00:06:32] So when you were, if we just take a step back, you said you were in the social care sector

[00:06:39] and you were exploring the potential of yourself.

[00:06:43] And you are asking a lot of the times for that feedback from others to different situations,

[00:06:49] different experiences.

[00:06:51] Yeah.

[00:06:52] How did that really encourage you to become that person that you are today?

[00:06:58] So what did you take away from that feedback as you were on that journey?

[00:07:04] Yeah.

[00:07:05] So an example was in a social care setting, one day, I mean, in my early career before

[00:07:12] even becoming a nurse, I remember helping an older lady in her 90s, you know, to sit

[00:07:20] up in her chair in her room.

[00:07:24] And I would just sit with her and have conversations.

[00:07:26] And I just admired them.

[00:07:29] And I was so passionate about, or perhaps some intrigued about the knowledge and experiences,

[00:07:38] the life they've lived and learning from them.

[00:07:40] And when I listened and then I asked questions, I remember her saying to me, you're good

[00:07:46] listener, aren't you?

[00:07:48] You know, and I thought, oh, I'm just so interested in you.

[00:07:51] So I wasn't doing it like trying to be listening, but genuinely just interested in her as a person

[00:07:58] the life she's lived, you know, what can I lend from her?

[00:08:02] Perhaps one day, if I mean my 90s, would I get this opportunity for someone to sit with

[00:08:07] me and have this conversation with me and meaningful conversation, you know.

[00:08:11] And you would say goodnight to them or I would say goodnight to her at nighttime if my

[00:08:16] shift was over.

[00:08:17] And we come with, for the next day to carry on with a conversation again, what else have

[00:08:23] we got to talk about?

[00:08:25] Something more beautiful.

[00:08:26] And she's got me listening and me asking questions, me telling her about what my experiences

[00:08:32] are as a young person.

[00:08:34] And we're comparing her life, my life, stuff like that.

[00:08:39] It was just so interesting.

[00:08:41] And I guess when people tell me you're an active listener, you're naturally very talented

[00:08:47] at listening to people.

[00:08:48] I'm like, oh, really?

[00:08:50] I just feel like I'm giving you space and I am really interested in what you are saying

[00:08:54] to me.

[00:08:55] So I didn't realize that again, it was just who I am because I think I'm not saying

[00:09:01] I'm perfect but I think sometimes we find it difficult to find someone who would really

[00:09:07] or actively listen to us when you have the space to want to share stuff but then there's

[00:09:14] ongoing interactions.

[00:09:16] But this is what my clients and friends and family find really safe to say, you would

[00:09:23] really listen to us.

[00:09:24] And when they need our risers and we need your feedback, he would offer it but I don't

[00:09:31] stop them from expressing who they are.

[00:09:33] And I validate them.

[00:09:36] So for me, it's really important that during that period I learned to try and find out

[00:09:41] who I really am because when you hear these feedback or comments or people praising you

[00:09:51] for something, you want to really understand why you've got that gift.

[00:09:56] So it was about spending time to get to know me as a person.

[00:10:01] So this is one piece of work I do with my clients.

[00:10:05] We do a piece of work about self awareness, you know, so identity, who are you really?

[00:10:10] So it's not just the person I'm seeing before me or in front of me but who are you really?

[00:10:16] Have you really spent time to get to know who you are?

[00:10:19] And I feel that there is a really important piece of work that if we can manage to do

[00:10:26] that every other block then falls into place because you're just building on that foundation

[00:10:31] of who that person is.

[00:10:33] And our identity is really important, it's just who we are, you know, no matter how you

[00:10:38] run away from it, you would always come back to finding it or not finding it so it's

[00:10:44] really important that we spend time to get to know who we are and also my, yeah, so

[00:10:51] I could go on and on by identity.

[00:10:53] So no, it's wonderful, you know, that taking people that first step to really connect with

[00:10:59] who they are, it is that foundation.

[00:11:03] Yeah.

[00:11:04] You've used feedback very effectively to understand yourself better and now you bring

[00:11:11] that to help others.

[00:11:13] But was there a point that you faced right at the start where you, before you even set

[00:11:18] up your business and moved into this boldness coaching area where you thought, is this really

[00:11:27] who I am?

[00:11:28] Were there any sticking points or challenges that you felt that you had to really dig a

[00:11:34] bit deeper so that you could move through and become that person you are today?

[00:11:39] So in everything, there are challenges, you know, and I wouldn't be human if I said

[00:11:45] that the way in times I questioned myself, you know.

[00:11:49] And then I realized that the more I questioned myself, the more I wanted to know more about

[00:11:55] myself and what I can do.

[00:11:58] So pushing boundaries, you know, and trying to find out what I can really achieve, what

[00:12:03] am I capable of doing?

[00:12:05] And the more feedback I get, the more I'm like, actually I can do this.

[00:12:09] And then I push further, you know, and then here another feedback, you're like, oh, so

[00:12:13] people actually see me like this, okay, I can push further again, you know, so it's doubting

[00:12:20] yourself at times, which sometimes I think we shouldn't always take it as a negative thing

[00:12:26] because it helps you to have a check, sort of like check yourself, you know, am I still

[00:12:33] on the right path or have I just swayed away a little bit and I just have to bring myself

[00:12:38] back onto the right path, you know.

[00:12:41] And so having those moments where I just check in with myself, are you still on that journey

[00:12:46] of boldness?

[00:13:16] Why am I doing this?

[00:13:18] You know, and it is that question and I ask myself and the passion that I have in me to

[00:13:25] help others really keeps preparing me forward to say keep going because you haven't gotten

[00:13:31] there yet.

[00:13:32] You need to still uncover things so you're able to teach others, you're able to empower

[00:13:38] indeed indeed and that's that's so true and part of the journey.

[00:13:44] That's such a great message to be leaving the listeners with because you know, when

[00:13:51] you run your own business and you've come out of working for other people now you're

[00:13:55] working for yourself we have to constantly be accountable to ourselves because when we're

[00:14:01] accountable to ourselves we can be accountable to others as well.

[00:14:04] And we do stretch ourselves as you've said, you want to see that there's more, there's

[00:14:09] more you can do and so you will push yourself as you said, you've pushed those boundaries

[00:14:16] but also having that point to come back to and those little moments that sometimes we

[00:14:23] go yeah there's something sticking.

[00:14:26] Yeah, we can get through the sticking point and that's the power of continuing with feedback

[00:14:34] and reaching out for that support but also visiting yourself every now and then and just

[00:14:39] go you know what how are you going in there?

[00:14:41] Is everything, is everything I have and what do I want to do next.

[00:14:45] So really great, great, great learning for the listeners to take away.

[00:14:52] So you know when you're, while you're building your business cedar and you're becoming this

[00:14:57] boldness coach it's a very strong, very powerful word about being very positive all of the

[00:15:02] time.

[00:15:03] I think it's fantastic.

[00:15:05] I actively encourage an enabler of people saying come on go beyond what more can you do?

[00:15:14] Where can you take this?

[00:15:16] So that's a high level of energy that needs to be released while in that space.

[00:15:23] How do you take a step back and recharge your mindset so that you can reset and be holding

[00:15:31] onto that energy when you need to be delivering with your clients?

[00:15:35] What do you do?

[00:15:36] Or you're asking me, girl.

[00:15:37] What do you do to share my secret to yourself?

[00:15:41] You're asking me to share my secret to my gorgeous one of your go to's.

[00:15:46] I'm going to share that.

[00:15:48] So you know how I talked about knowing yourself is really important for me.

[00:15:54] Knowing my source is also really important.

[00:15:58] So my source is personally, it's my faith.

[00:16:03] So because of my faith when I'm feeling low, I know how to recharge my batteries and

[00:16:09] how I do that is I go into meditation and I meditate, meditate on scriptures or my

[00:16:16] affirmations you know.

[00:16:19] And that just, it's like I'm renewed again, you know.

[00:16:24] And that is my go to my main go to find that boldness and that strength, you know.

[00:16:31] So I know not everyone of my clients has a faith but when we do that piece of work in the

[00:16:37] identity, we uncover what your source really is or energizes you.

[00:16:43] So just in case you haven't realized it, that piece of work is so important.

[00:16:47] So you can write it boldly somewhere so that when you're feeling that little bit low

[00:16:52] or you start sensing the coming on, you can start saying to myself, this is my go to

[00:16:57] place that I need to go and I recharge.

[00:16:59] So almost like knowing like your phone and your phone battery is running down, you've

[00:17:05] got to find a socket somewhere quickly and plug it in, you know.

[00:17:09] So when you've noticed that the power coming down, don't wait till it gets to zero because

[00:17:15] it takes longer to then recharge to 100%, isn't it?

[00:17:19] If you know you're going to be on a call that will take perhaps an hour and you can see

[00:17:25] that your battery is down to say 30%, perhaps you might not get through the hour conversation.

[00:17:31] So while I'm you quickly go and switch on, put it on the charge somewhere and get a little

[00:17:37] bit on.

[00:17:38] So when I'm dealing with working with my clients and I know that sometimes some of the

[00:17:44] cases might be quiet tense, I've always got to go and recharge.

[00:17:49] So charge and I come and I'm full of that energy and I hope that the energy that I have

[00:17:55] or I radiate, I'm able to then send it to the client, you know.

[00:17:59] Right.

[00:18:00] You're like an energizer battery, you fully power up.

[00:18:04] Yes.

[00:18:05] And you can deliver that but you're encouraging that in others.

[00:18:08] So I think it's really important for the listeners to think, you know, we want to have a level

[00:18:14] of energy so that we can show us, show up as the best version of ourselves with that strength,

[00:18:19] with that clarity of our communication.

[00:18:22] But at the same time, you can't be like that all the time, you've got to go away and find

[00:18:27] something that gives you that energy back, that you can, for me, it's going outside

[00:18:32] and being in nature.

[00:18:33] I walk every day and it's in silence and I walk by myself and it's just a meditative practice

[00:18:41] that made as a non-negotiable for you, you turn to your faith.

[00:18:46] Other people might go and rest, they might just sleep or they might go and hit on the treadmill

[00:18:52] and they might run five miles on a dress.

[00:18:56] Yes.

[00:18:57] All different things.

[00:18:59] Exactly, but when we can find a way to rebuild ourselves, to re-energise, it builds that level

[00:19:07] of resilience in us so that we can keep doing the things that we do.

[00:19:11] So fantastic.

[00:19:12] I love that you have that go to, that you know where you can plug in.

[00:19:17] But what would you say then, Ceta, are your three Candid tips that you live by and you'd

[00:19:24] like to share with the audience today?

[00:19:26] What would that be?

[00:19:27] So, for me, it's Man No Dyself.

[00:19:32] No woman No Dyself.

[00:19:35] So it's really important that we know who we are.

[00:19:38] Okay.

[00:19:39] And as I said, minus faith.

[00:19:41] So whatever it is for whoever, so I call it your source.

[00:19:46] So find out what your sources.

[00:19:48] So if we're using the analogy of a battery, sorry, a phone, you know that the source is

[00:19:53] the power points to charge in.

[00:19:55] So find your source where that energy would come from for you to build on.

[00:20:00] And then even if you have, you know your identity and you know your source, you've got

[00:20:05] to get something that will keep you going.

[00:20:08] So you need to have a purpose, so your goal was your goal.

[00:20:12] You know?

[00:20:13] So if you have that goal, then you can be working your charge up.

[00:20:17] Oh, I love this analogy.

[00:20:19] Think of it.

[00:20:20] You're charged up.

[00:20:23] You're charged up.

[00:20:24] You go and do the job, your battery's falling and then you come back and you charge, you

[00:20:28] know?

[00:20:29] So you know the process because you know who you are.

[00:20:32] So you know how it's going and you just keep, oh, that's amazing.

[00:20:36] It's just come to me now and that's beautiful.

[00:20:38] Gotta be sharing that with people now.

[00:20:40] Good.

[00:20:41] Good, good.

[00:20:43] Excellent, excellent.

[00:20:44] Knowing yourself, knowing your purpose and empowering yourself up as well.

[00:20:50] Trees very, very good tips to be sharing with people because we all need that little

[00:20:56] boost, that bit of motivation.

[00:20:57] Yeah.

[00:20:58] And I'm just kind of falling off a little bit but what can I do to get back on?

[00:21:04] All of these are very inspiring for the listeners to take away.

[00:21:08] Yeah.

[00:21:09] So my last question for you then, Ceta.

[00:21:12] How do you?

[00:21:13] How do you describe the wonderful opportunity that having a candle mindset has done for

[00:21:19] you and your life?

[00:21:21] How does it really help you to be the person you want to be and to continue growing

[00:21:27] the business that you're growing?

[00:21:29] So having that candle mindset or attitude for me just reminds me every day that no mountains

[00:21:36] too high.

[00:21:38] You know?

[00:21:39] So when challenges and obstacles come, I literally initially it's a shocker to the body, isn't

[00:21:48] it?

[00:21:49] To your system that oh my goodness.

[00:21:51] I wasn't expecting this one.

[00:21:52] Okay, it's come.

[00:21:53] And then I get over at that moment, get time to let us sink in and then get over it and

[00:22:00] I'm like, this is my next success story.

[00:22:03] You know?

[00:22:04] So in the same way, this concept is what I've used to build my business.

[00:22:08] To say the challenges that are thrown at me, they're supposed to be a lesson in these

[00:22:12] challenges.

[00:22:13] I lend from it and then I build on and then my business grows and then it grows and I'm

[00:22:18] like, wow, by initially as human when it's coming you can't help but think why is this happening?

[00:22:25] So it's okay to take a moment, accept it that it's happened.

[00:22:30] Now what can I do about it?

[00:22:32] Where is the lesson in this one?

[00:22:33] You know?

[00:22:34] I always keep like a little book in the pen.

[00:22:40] So I'm just writing the lessons that are coming from the challenges that are being thrown

[00:22:45] and then from those lessons, I'm able to build something out of it.

[00:22:49] The next block to add to the building, you know?

[00:22:51] Yeah.

[00:22:52] Definitely definitely.

[00:22:53] And I love that you chose those words that no mountain is too high and the wonderful

[00:22:57] words of Tina Turner as well in her song because we get up every day and if we can get

[00:23:04] up with that mindset that you're sharing and you can think how am I going to be bold

[00:23:10] today?

[00:23:11] What does it look like to be bold or what can I do to be bolder or my bolder in this situation?

[00:23:20] That drives you forward.

[00:23:21] So it's been an absolute pleasure to talk to you and my listeners will take away a lot

[00:23:27] and I hope it empowers them to think more boldly about themselves in their lives and

[00:23:33] their businesses and their careers as well.

[00:23:36] And thank you so much for being my guest today on The Can Do Away.

[00:23:41] Thank you for having me, Gail.

[00:23:43] Thank you.

[00:23:44] Thank you for listening to my podcast The Can Do Away.

[00:23:48] Do you live in Bree the Can Do Attitude?

[00:23:52] Since 2019, My Podcast has gifted listeners across the globe access to an incredible selection

[00:23:59] of guests with stories to refresh your perspective, bring you joy and inspire Can Do

[00:24:05] positivity.

[00:24:06] Always curious and with an insatiable appetite for a good yarn, I invite you to be a guest

[00:24:14] on my weekly show.

[00:24:15] If you have an inspiring perspective, a life changing experience or an intriguing story

[00:24:21] to share, then drop me an email at gailmgibson.com.

[00:24:27] Until next week's show, do share the inspiration of The Can Do Away podcast with your friends,

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[00:24:38] Remember to make every day an amazing Can Do Day.