A heartfelt reflection on the power of belonging and the courage it takes to stop shrinking. Learn to take up space, embrace your voice, and own your presence without guilt, shame, or fear. You deserve to be seen and heard.
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[00:00:08] Hello Sunshine and how have you been? How's your week been for you? Today we are going to be talking about taking up space. And there's this quote by Shonda Rhimes and every time I read it, it seems to have some sort of an effect on me. It goes, plenty of people will decide that you can't do something.
[00:00:35] Plenty of people will decide that this room is not for you to be in. Your job, however, is for you to decide that every room you are in is a room that you belong in and to remain there. And I always think that that's the most important thing, to feel like you belong in every room you're in. And once you're there, you're good to go.
[00:01:01] And it's true for so many of us, you know, the ones who are shy, the ones who hide in a corner, who are quick to shrink away and only too relieved to not be seen or heard. Some of us struggle to feel like we belong. You know, but the truth is, we have to learn to be comfortable with taking up space.
[00:01:26] Shrinking away or hiding away or feeling too relieved because we're not seen or heard is no way to live. You know, as human beings, we all have this innate need to feel like we belong. Perhaps that's why we make friends. We fall in love. We have families. We pursue hobbies. We travel. We work.
[00:01:54] Because when we do all of this, we connect. We meet new people. We feel like we belong. It's probably also why we join clubs. A book club, for example. It's probably why we confide in someone. Because these are all a few examples of us taking up space. You know, it's a way of us occupying a little space, maybe physically or psychologically or emotionally.
[00:02:22] You know, the reason why people sometimes shy away from taking up space, maybe because they grew up in a household where they were criticized for being too loud or too needy and were told to keep quiet and, you know, go away and stand in a corner or something. Who knows? But a lot of us probably have had some reason why shrinking away or hiding away seemed easier than taking up space.
[00:02:51] You know, and I'm not talking about taking up space in a toxic manner when a person is always dominating a conversation or excluding others from a conversation. I'm talking about space for those of us who struggle and we can break them up into small steps. Like beginning with yourself, for example. Even if it's awkward for you, stop worrying about how people will perceive you.
[00:03:18] You need to learn to follow your heart and express yourself. Believe that you're loved for who you are, not for what you own or what you do. You know, nobody is perfect. And everyone, each one of us is flawed in some manner. Each one of us has some imperfection in us.
[00:03:43] So a simple reminder is to maybe look at yourself in the mirror daily and tell yourself, you're worth it. You're beautiful just the way you are. There are a few of us who tend to react with shame or anger or guilt or fear when we are confronted with some sort of rejection or conflict of some sort. That's when you have to remind yourself that someone not acknowledging you is not the end of the world.
[00:04:13] You know, if we all want to have these beautiful, peaceful, healthy relationships in our lives, creating space for ourselves through our words, our actions, our presence becomes important. Begin to rethink and relearn or rather maybe unlearn what you've been conditioned to believe about your presence and your power.
[00:04:38] With time, you will realize it's possible to find your voice and assert your rightful place. And so there's this quote that sums it all up. You are allowed to take up space over who you are and what you want for yourself. Stop downplaying the things you care about, the hopes you have. Own your passions, your thoughts and your perceptions. Own your fire.
[00:05:04] Stop putting your worth in the hands of others and stop letting them decide your value. Own saying no. Own your mood. Own your feelings. Own your plans. Own your paths. Own your success. All I'd like to tell each one of you is just own who you are and take up space without feeling the shame, the guilt, the fear.
[00:05:32] Take good care of yourselves, everyone. And we'll speak to you again next week. Bye for now.