Overcoming Bullying and Finding Happiness: A Journey with Rishita Makhija

[00:00:00] [SPEAKER_02]: I lost all my weight, started looking really really good.

[00:00:04] [SPEAKER_02]: Went into part in Miss Chennai 2009.

[00:00:09] [SPEAKER_02]: Post that started modelling in Chennai.

[00:00:12] [SPEAKER_02]: But again the irony became I lost all my weight and I was not happy.

[00:00:17] [SPEAKER_02]: You were still not happy?

[00:00:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah I was still not happy and that's why...

[00:00:19] [SPEAKER_06]: And you were aware of this?

[00:00:20] [SPEAKER_02]: And I think what I rediscovered and you know about myself while I was pregnant

[00:00:25] [SPEAKER_02]: the amount of work I put with myself and as even today as a mother

[00:00:30] [SPEAKER_02]: I think it's brilliant.

[00:00:31] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't think so.

[00:00:32] [SPEAKER_02]: I've seen a better version of myself than I have seen today.

[00:00:35] [SPEAKER_06]: Yeah you said you had your journey right from 13 years and then winning the pageant

[00:00:40] [SPEAKER_06]: and then realizing that this is not really road to happiness and happiness is beyond that.

[00:00:45] [SPEAKER_02]: Imagine you're in this big celebration and you're supposed to be happy.

[00:00:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Everything is perfect.

[00:00:49] [SPEAKER_06]: Everybody is happy.

[00:00:51] [SPEAKER_06]: Everybody is kind of vibing.

[00:00:52] [SPEAKER_02]: What's wrong with me?

[00:00:54] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm like am I like what's wrong with me?

[00:00:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Why am I finding this?

[00:00:58] [SPEAKER_02]: Then the answers would be like oh maybe because you're bullied but in this environment you're not.

[00:01:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't wait for my husband to compliment me because in the morning I tell myself

[00:01:05] [SPEAKER_02]: you're the most amazing wife.

[00:01:07] [SPEAKER_02]: Like he's so blessed to have you.

[00:01:09] [SPEAKER_02]: So there is no room for you know expectations.

[00:01:12] [SPEAKER_02]: There's fulfillment inside.

[00:01:14] [SPEAKER_02]: Because otherwise we are seeking and then comes your affirmations.

[00:01:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Welcome to the show Rishita Makija.

[00:01:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you so much.

[00:01:21] [SPEAKER_06]: How are you feeling today?

[00:01:22] [SPEAKER_06]: Very very well.

[00:01:23] [SPEAKER_06]: Did you manifest this?

[00:01:24] [SPEAKER_06]: Yes I'm sure.

[00:01:26] [SPEAKER_02]: I think anything to do with women I would love to be a part of it and I think there's no better way

[00:01:32] [SPEAKER_02]: to start off doing a podcast with something which says unstoppable women so I'm quite excited.

[00:01:39] [SPEAKER_02]: Our honor.

[00:01:40] [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you.

[00:01:41] [SPEAKER_06]: Love story here.

[00:01:43] [SPEAKER_06]: 13 years when you realize that there is something going on.

[00:01:47] [SPEAKER_06]: Very early on to realize that okay my life is not okay or not okay should I need to do something about it?

[00:01:57] [SPEAKER_02]: I think it was because I was so frustrated and I was so unhappy that I and there was nothing

[00:02:05] [SPEAKER_02]: I would look forward for.

[00:02:07] [SPEAKER_02]: At 13?

[00:02:08] [SPEAKER_02]: At 13 like I would hate to go to school.

[00:02:11] [SPEAKER_02]: This is Chinnai?

[00:02:12] [SPEAKER_02]: Yes because you know they used to call me the Vellaypani which is the white pig.

[00:02:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Because I was fair and I was very chubby.

[00:02:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Now I call myself chubby.

[00:02:22] [SPEAKER_06]: Chubby overweight.

[00:02:23] [SPEAKER_06]: Farak.

[00:02:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah now I call myself chubby I was coming to that.

[00:02:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Otherwise I was fat.

[00:02:30] [SPEAKER_02]: So I would call myself like they would call I was bullied by the whole statement they would

[00:02:35] [SPEAKER_02]: call me the Vellaypani which is the white pig and everybody would say that in school.

[00:02:41] [SPEAKER_02]: Like imagine walking to an environment where your nickname is that you would not look forward

[00:02:46] [SPEAKER_02]: for it and I would come back home and you know you play down with these kids and I already had

[00:02:52] [SPEAKER_02]: a crush with a very cute looking boy.

[00:02:54] [SPEAKER_02]: Beautiful eyes.

[00:02:56] [SPEAKER_02]: I've always been like very fond of good-looking eyes.

[00:02:59] [SPEAKER_02]: He would run away from me like he would see me coming and he would like run away in the next

[00:03:03] [SPEAKER_02]: direction and I realized what's happening.

[00:03:06] [SPEAKER_02]: There was like nothing in my life which seemed to be going right though I was actually in a

[00:03:12] [SPEAKER_02]: very loving family financials were never an issue.

[00:03:15] [SPEAKER_02]: Totally my father's princess like everything would come to me before I even asked for it that's

[00:03:21] [SPEAKER_02]: how I've been bought up but somehow something was missing and that was frustrating me.

[00:03:27] [SPEAKER_02]: You know when you're even in happy moments and you still don't feel happy I was like why?

[00:03:33] [SPEAKER_02]: I think that's when the question is done.

[00:03:34] [SPEAKER_02]: But you were questioning why?

[00:03:35] [SPEAKER_04]: You were questioning yourself.

[00:03:35] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah I was questioning because you know you're still you're like imagine you're in this

[00:03:39] [SPEAKER_02]: big celebration and you're supposed to be happy.

[00:03:42] [SPEAKER_02]: Everybody is happy.

[00:03:44] [SPEAKER_06]: Everybody's kind of vibing.

[00:03:45] [SPEAKER_06]: What's wrong with me?

[00:03:46] [SPEAKER_02]: What's wrong with me?

[00:03:47] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm like am I like what's wrong with me?

[00:03:50] [SPEAKER_02]: Why am I finding this?

[00:03:51] [SPEAKER_02]: Then the answers would be like oh maybe because you're bullied but in this environment you're not

[00:03:56] [SPEAKER_02]: with your family or absolutely accepted then what?

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_06]: But were you close to any family member?

[00:04:03] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm very close to my father and my mother.

[00:04:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Like we have a close knit family.

[00:04:07] [SPEAKER_06]: But did you share with them?

[00:04:08] [SPEAKER_06]: That's what you were feeling?

[00:04:09] [SPEAKER_02]: So yeah that's one point I did go to my mother and did tell her that you know I don't feel happy.

[00:04:14] [SPEAKER_02]: But you know what the beauty is then you know what mental health wasn't spoken about so I

[00:04:19] [SPEAKER_02]: can't blame her because very sweetly she said you have everything a girl of your age can ever

[00:04:27] [SPEAKER_02]: dream of which was also true.

[00:04:29] [SPEAKER_02]: She's like then why are you not happy?

[00:04:31] [SPEAKER_02]: Neither.

[00:04:32] [SPEAKER_02]: So that was the answer I was technically looking at for why am I not happy?

[00:04:36] [SPEAKER_02]: That's the question which came back to me and I remember she telling me something which she said

[00:04:41] [SPEAKER_02]: you know she said oh Vishadha you know what it's in your and very casually how you tell your child

[00:04:47] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't even think she realized the seriousness or the impact this statement would make on me

[00:04:52] [SPEAKER_02]: where she said you know what it's in your hand how can you make yourself happy?

[00:04:57] [SPEAKER_02]: Like you have everything now you decide how can you make yourself happy.

[00:05:00] [SPEAKER_06]: But that's very sweet of her yeah because see parents

[00:05:02] [SPEAKER_06]: it's very important for parents to validate one second like you know that I hear you

[00:05:08] [SPEAKER_06]: I'm listening to you I'm validating in a way that okay I have heard you out and then she's also telling

[00:05:15] [SPEAKER_06]: you the next step to take.

[00:05:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah so she just just told me she said you know what you have everything now you see how

[00:05:22] [SPEAKER_02]: you can make yourself happy and it was a very casual statement and at that moment but something

[00:05:28] [SPEAKER_02]: shift because I went back to my room again crying like I would cry that I don't want to wake up

[00:05:33] [SPEAKER_02]: I because I didn't want to go to school I was like the biggest like oh my god I don't want to

[00:05:37] [SPEAKER_02]: enter that place I couldn't make friends because.

[00:05:40] [SPEAKER_02]: But you were bullied in school and at home also?

[00:05:43] [SPEAKER_06]: Not at home.

[00:05:43] [SPEAKER_06]: No I mean where the kids used to be.

[00:05:46] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah kids down that's that's how they were.

[00:05:47] [SPEAKER_06]: Any kind of kids were making fun basically.

[00:05:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah fun of my weight so I was always.

[00:05:52] [SPEAKER_06]: Or did it get into your head?

[00:05:54] [SPEAKER_06]: Were you also perceiving the world like that they are making fun of me?

[00:05:57] [SPEAKER_02]: It can be you know now I can't remember but I remember being unhappy.

[00:06:01] [SPEAKER_06]: And you remember the feeling of unhappiness?

[00:06:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I remember the feeling because you know but whenever you would run how we used to be younger we used

[00:06:06] [SPEAKER_02]: to go down in an art time just to really play down and I would run and they'd be like

[00:06:10] [SPEAKER_02]: if she's the catcher even better none of us are going to get caught how is she going to run.

[00:06:15] [SPEAKER_06]: So those nine remarks were suggested.

[00:06:19] [SPEAKER_02]: And you know when they would laugh about it I wish I could laugh about it I think then

[00:06:22] [SPEAKER_02]: I'd have been more casual because these days I see a lot of people be like you know what

[00:06:26] [SPEAKER_02]: we don't care but then it just like and when it's your trigger you know it pinches you a little bit

[00:06:32] [SPEAKER_02]: more so everywhere they said I felt like you know nobody is mine.

[00:06:38] [SPEAKER_02]: So when I would come home I think I was so close to my parents because I would be like at

[00:06:42] [SPEAKER_02]: least they'll get me yeah and then when I went and told her I'm not happy she's like now you

[00:06:47] [SPEAKER_02]: find your happiness I'm like what do I do then I felt more lost to be very honest.

[00:06:53] [SPEAKER_02]: But then the whole journey then I remember asking myself if you had to be happy so that very night

[00:06:59] [SPEAKER_02]: I said what would I do yeah you know what was my desire yeah it my only desire was to eat guilt-free

[00:07:06] [SPEAKER_02]: ah okay that's all I wanted. So I remember eating an ice cream yeah and not bothering

[00:07:13] [SPEAKER_02]: that this will make me put on because you know everybody looks at your weight and say

[00:07:16] [SPEAKER_02]: don't eat this you'll become fat don't eat this so it was such a block that when I would

[00:07:21] [SPEAKER_02]: eat it I love food even today to be very honest I love my food so then also I loved food but every

[00:07:27] [SPEAKER_02]: time I would eat it I'll guilt eat. So that was like the emotion I would put guilt so I'm not enjoying

[00:07:33] [SPEAKER_02]: it but that night when I had that bowl of ice cream guilt free I actually felt a little happy

[00:07:42] [SPEAKER_02]: and it was the first time I actually sensed something

[00:07:46] [SPEAKER_02]: change something inside yeah it was a different emotion I was like not bad yeah

[00:07:52] [SPEAKER_02]: so that led to you to look into that led me to look into you know just I think me accepting

[00:08:01] [SPEAKER_06]: accepting one that there is weight there is weight and I think it's okay you accepted it yeah

[00:08:07] [SPEAKER_02]: I think I shifted from that day it didn't really shift it was a process I would be very

[00:08:12] [SPEAKER_02]: honest it was not like instantly no I felt okay I'm happy I remember eating for a week

[00:08:17] [SPEAKER_02]: it was like my free ticket I was like now I'm feeling good let me now enjoy my food because

[00:08:23] [SPEAKER_02]: that gave me happiness and every time someone told me at that phase that you know should I eat a

[00:08:28] [SPEAKER_02]: little lesser I would be like you know what I love it I just love to eat so something I found

[00:08:35] [SPEAKER_02]: in my life which I love to do and I think that it's and I think slowly slowly because I think

[00:08:41] [SPEAKER_02]: I started accepting myself a little bit I also started like feeling that people started accepting

[00:08:47] [SPEAKER_02]: me why is you had bought out you know like you know was it in your head maybe it was then you

[00:08:52] [SPEAKER_02]: know I started feeling and I end the trigger became lesser the trigger which lived within me which I

[00:08:57] [SPEAKER_02]: would get poked so easily about I think that began essentially it's all within us it's what we

[00:09:04] [SPEAKER_06]: think and what we emit in it exactly what we will catch yeah it's like how you see yourself

[00:09:09] [SPEAKER_02]: is how the world actually looks at and how you treat yourself also exactly yep and then you went

[00:09:15] [SPEAKER_02]: about losing weight yeah then I went crazy I lost my weight I decided that this is going to be it

[00:09:21] [SPEAKER_02]: yes Rishita is going to be the most hottest girl and then there was a different relationship

[00:09:29] [SPEAKER_02]: I of course I worked a lot on my relationship and then I remember feeding books like you know

[00:09:34] [SPEAKER_02]: chicken soup for the soul it was very small I started small and started you know putting my hands

[00:09:39] [SPEAKER_02]: on these very few self-help books where I don't know if I understood or how much you were absorbing

[00:09:46] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah I was always a read I used to enjoy I used to more of course read more of you know

[00:09:53] [SPEAKER_02]: frictions but you know like how one of those copies you will pick up a very basic one very

[00:09:58] [SPEAKER_02]: and something it started changing but my eventual goal became I have to lose weight

[00:10:04] [SPEAKER_02]: because that's going to make me extremely happy when jimming I didn't go jimming I

[00:10:09] [SPEAKER_02]: at one point I stopped eating from enjoying yes then I started realizing oh you know what like

[00:10:16] [SPEAKER_02]: now it's it's affecting then I would like in a very unhealthy way if I had to say

[00:10:21] [SPEAKER_02]: but I had become so obsessed I said you know what like if I had to do what would make me happy

[00:10:27] [SPEAKER_02]: would be seeing myself in like really lean so I said if that's the goal and I'm someone I realized that

[00:10:34] [SPEAKER_02]: how adamant and how stubborn I can be because I killed it I nailed it I lost all my weight

[00:10:42] [SPEAKER_02]: started looking really really good went and took part in miss Chennai 2009 post that started

[00:10:50] [SPEAKER_02]: modeling in Chennai but again the irony you became I lost all my weight and I was not happy

[00:10:57] [SPEAKER_02]: I was still not happy and that's when you were aware of this I wasn't aware you know I really

[00:11:02] [SPEAKER_02]: thought you know so how the first time when I won like you know I was taking part of the title

[00:11:08] [SPEAKER_02]: it gave me happiness because I got a lot of validation yeah I was aware that you know

[00:11:13] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm feeling good now I'm really feeling good I've got it but again you know how you know

[00:11:17] [SPEAKER_02]: again I was talking about the same feeling I went back to something is missing

[00:11:22] [SPEAKER_06]: now what is missing I have no idea so when you say something is missing is it like a feeling of

[00:11:26] [SPEAKER_06]: that you don't feel complete yeah it's where you are like right now I'm sitting here I feel

[00:11:31] [SPEAKER_06]: I'm here yes 100% but back in those days what you're referring to yeah I would be

[00:11:37] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not who and you know and I don't feel good yeah and is this what I wanted to do

[00:11:45] [SPEAKER_02]: is this good enough am I good enough because self doubt only what was the root cause

[00:11:52] [SPEAKER_02]: so honestly you know I would always keep seeking within around getting in very recently last

[00:12:02] [SPEAKER_02]: August I did a course where I went really deep and it showed up that was never me

[00:12:08] [SPEAKER_02]: the root cause was never me I think it's like you know when my mom had me in a womb

[00:12:15] [SPEAKER_02]: she all her inhibitions like the fear the whole idea of you know not loving herself enough being

[00:12:23] [SPEAKER_02]: scared fear of just like belonging so she had moved from Bombay to Chennai and I was an accidental

[00:12:31] [SPEAKER_02]: honeymoon baby okay so you know there's a new house a new city you don't get time and in that

[00:12:37] [SPEAKER_02]: in those days there was you know right now we at least really bless we have things to

[00:12:42] [SPEAKER_02]: dispose of if I need help I can go around yeah she was absolutely lost I think all of that was a

[00:12:49] [SPEAKER_02]: gift to me because I think I experienced everything way before I was born in there and I just

[00:12:56] [SPEAKER_02]: carried that forward in the womb yes up until I've been working on like fixing it but that's

[00:13:03] [SPEAKER_02]: when I realized it's come from somewhere where it didn't belong to me and can I blame her of

[00:13:10] [SPEAKER_02]: course I can't because she would have done her best in awareness but how we don't realize where

[00:13:15] [SPEAKER_02]: we are getting so many of her beliefs from it starts as early as the womb but what you're saying

[00:13:21] [SPEAKER_06]: is like for all nine months yes there was this feeling of whatever those feelings were negative

[00:13:29] [SPEAKER_06]: feelings which stayed on and got rubbed off on you I would say you know what the beauty of

[00:13:35] [SPEAKER_02]: all you know the womb learning is it's so powerful you know you have a child when they're out it's so

[00:13:42] [SPEAKER_02]: difficult to pass in anything to them because they want to know why if but while you're in your womb

[00:13:47] [SPEAKER_02]: you know it's like you feel it when your mom feels it so if you feel like you can literally test

[00:13:54] [SPEAKER_02]: it like when you're feeling stressed when you're pregnant and you touch your womb you can see that

[00:13:58] [SPEAKER_02]: child's heartbeat is also racing as yours that's true yeah not only that like then when I went on

[00:14:06] [SPEAKER_02]: discussing this a little bit more and you know finding out what this means I also realized that

[00:14:12] [SPEAKER_02]: you know Arjun had a son like in the Mahabharat yes yes and Abhinav Anu had actually learned how

[00:14:20] [SPEAKER_02]: to get inside the kuruk sheath because Arjun had shared it with his wife while she was pregnant

[00:14:24] [SPEAKER_02]: and guess what he never yes never shared it to come out yes so it's like in our history it's been told

[00:14:31] [SPEAKER_02]: that when you are actually having a child earlier there was a phase also there in olden times they

[00:14:37] [SPEAKER_02]: used to actually seclude you know pregnant women in a good environment in a happy environment so

[00:14:43] [SPEAKER_02]: that you know the child feels that way out of the stress out of the hustle yeah right now we

[00:14:49] [SPEAKER_06]: can't afford to do this yeah no I mean you know you're right I mean you you're saying this and

[00:14:53] [SPEAKER_06]: this is a good topic to talk about because women when they do take a back seat right if they slow down

[00:15:00] [SPEAKER_06]: then there is a pause in the career and it's very difficult to come back and the zillion stories

[00:15:06] [SPEAKER_06]: on this show itself in which women have suffered because of taking those choices and I think I

[00:15:12] [SPEAKER_06]: made a very strong choice myself to take the pause for two and a half years and I gave whatever you're

[00:15:21] [SPEAKER_06]: telling me the positivity affirmations visualization everything during pregnancy to my kid and I did

[00:15:29] [SPEAKER_06]: it because obviously late pregnancy so I'm aware of all of these things very wise by now right

[00:15:34] [SPEAKER_06]: with the fear that if I do stop I'll never be able to go back to my career

[00:15:40] [SPEAKER_06]: the same energy and the same you know designation same level but you know what it didn't affect

[00:15:47] [SPEAKER_06]: I've come back I've bounced back it really didn't matter and I think you're going and this is a

[00:15:52] [SPEAKER_06]: message to many women out there right it's your fear which is stopping you it's nothing else

[00:15:56] [SPEAKER_02]: exactly I and I think you know what I think you bounce back stronger I think having my son

[00:16:02] [SPEAKER_02]: with me is one of my biggest reasons where I you know work better I think he's my soul connect

[00:16:11] [SPEAKER_02]: and I think just having his energy having his insight I think have become as you said wiser

[00:16:16] [SPEAKER_02]: I think he just made me wiser and when you I think when you become a mother you also

[00:16:22] [SPEAKER_02]: have two choices like as you said women feel so worried that oh my god I'm going to get pregnant

[00:16:26] [SPEAKER_02]: my life is over things are going to change I think it's a brilliant time to redefine and rediscover

[00:16:33] [SPEAKER_02]: yourself yes and I think what I rediscovered and you know about myself while I was pregnant

[00:16:40] [SPEAKER_02]: the amount of work I put with myself and as even today as a mother I think it's brilliant I

[00:16:46] [SPEAKER_02]: don't think so I've seen a better version of myself than I have seen today yeah a more

[00:16:52] [SPEAKER_02]: calm kids make you very very patient very you know also very balanced very synchronized because

[00:16:58] [SPEAKER_06]: if you do spend time on yourself during pregnancy you know the kind of food good for you is good

[00:17:03] [SPEAKER_06]: for your kid the kind of balance the routine and because all that has you have to give to your

[00:17:08] [SPEAKER_06]: kid when the kid is out right though you have to put them in a balance you have to put them

[00:17:12] [SPEAKER_06]: in a discipline a routine you need to feed them the right thing the all vitamins proteins

[00:17:17] [SPEAKER_06]: everything has to be balanced on their plate so if you do that to yourself during pregnancy

[00:17:22] [SPEAKER_06]: anyway those hormones have trickled down to the womb and then the base is already there in their

[00:17:27] [SPEAKER_06]: body I wouldn't mind and soul and then you're just living it together so it's a very strange

[00:17:32] [SPEAKER_02]: thing okay because I believe so much in affirmations and you know I've had a history with weight

[00:17:36] [SPEAKER_02]: so I really like yeah I really I like you know how somehow that one little cell shows up

[00:17:42] [SPEAKER_02]: but now I've come with this new thing which I always believe whatever I eat like I eat guilt-free

[00:17:47] [SPEAKER_02]: so it's going to serve me so we as we speak about you know nutrition discipline my son eats a pizza

[00:17:53] [SPEAKER_02]: saying this is the healthiest meal in the world yeah that's what it works about I've heard about

[00:17:59] [SPEAKER_06]: this for sure yeah so I it doesn't matter it's it's it's the energy intention and intent

[00:18:05] [SPEAKER_02]: which is going out and I think with like through my pregnancy I was so conscious about

[00:18:12] [SPEAKER_02]: what my thoughts were going and of course you will get these ups and downs I'm not living like a

[00:18:16] [SPEAKER_02]: very daily life we have it but I think the way you then know understand how to

[00:18:22] [SPEAKER_06]: work with your emotions yes because I think once you're aware and like you said you had your

[00:18:27] [SPEAKER_06]: journey right from 13 years and then winning the pageant and then realizing that this is

[00:18:32] [SPEAKER_06]: not really road to happiness and happiness is beyond that and now are you happy yes now I'm very

[00:18:39] [SPEAKER_02]: content yeah I think I found my purpose what is your purpose my purpose is truly to help people

[00:18:44] [SPEAKER_02]: like I the reason I got into coaching also was like every single time I would see someone like

[00:18:50] [SPEAKER_02]: I made a difference I felt happy so every time I tell all my clients I said you know while

[00:18:55] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm serving you honestly I'm serving myself because you see a part of yourself in there

[00:18:59] [SPEAKER_02]: it's not even just that I think now because I've worked so much now I've detached okay yeah so thankfully

[00:19:06] [SPEAKER_02]: like I'm like that I don't feel so the strong emotions are not really yeah not there but you

[00:19:10] [SPEAKER_02]: know when I just feel very content and satisfied you know like oh it's like when you are living

[00:19:17] [SPEAKER_02]: your purpose and we're doing what is supposed to be doing your spiritual as a friend of mine

[00:19:21] [SPEAKER_02]: would said this a very strong statement has stuck to me and I really feel when I do this

[00:19:27] [SPEAKER_02]: I really feel that you know I'm happy gives me happiness seeing something and it doesn't matter

[00:19:33] [SPEAKER_02]: for me I come from that that you know thought or school of thought it doesn't really matter I touch

[00:19:38] [SPEAKER_02]: like million lives thousand life it really doesn't matter even five ten even one is enough

[00:19:43] [SPEAKER_02]: like even I know and I can see that and I see even one if I could do something for one I said

[00:19:49] [SPEAKER_06]: I think so nice because you know in a world which is just going crazy with followers and subscribers

[00:19:56] [SPEAKER_06]: you know it's it's it's pretty crazy out there the digital world at the moment but

[00:20:00] [SPEAKER_06]: you just said it right even if you change one person's life and give it all what you understand

[00:20:06] [SPEAKER_06]: about life as is and give it to them which which kind of benefits them that's it that's it yeah

[00:20:12] [SPEAKER_06]: exactly but tell us a bit about where you learned manifestation visualization obviously

[00:20:17] [SPEAKER_06]: there is there's learning behind it and you've invested in yourself so our listeners would really

[00:20:23] [SPEAKER_02]: love to know that so you know as I said I started modeling I had become very arrogant because when

[00:20:28] [SPEAKER_02]: you go to the sets they come and tell you do you want to have coconut water do you want to this

[00:20:33] [SPEAKER_02]: I would come home with the same arrogance I be like what am I gonna do this and my mom being

[00:20:37] [SPEAKER_02]: the grounded person she is she was like sweetheart this doesn't work here so you

[00:20:41] [SPEAKER_02]: need to get out and get going of course you know modeling you get paid such a good amount

[00:20:46] [SPEAKER_02]: at such a young age that any any job seems very petty yes because that's your amount which it's

[00:20:54] [SPEAKER_02]: like lesser than what you make in like one day for the whole month yeah so there was no connection

[00:20:58] [SPEAKER_02]: but I said you know what moms are moms you can't like say no to them and you've got to do what

[00:21:02] [SPEAKER_02]: she's got to and I said I'll prove her a point so coincidentally there was someone I you I

[00:21:07] [SPEAKER_02]: you know about her I'm sure she's called Pooja Puneet she's also a life coach and she's she had

[00:21:13] [SPEAKER_02]: come down she had just learned from Jack Anfield okay who thought of chicken soup for the soul

[00:21:17] [SPEAKER_02]: like personally she had gone to US and she had come down she was searching for someone

[00:21:21] [SPEAKER_02]: do you know like I'll work with her okay so she happened to be my mom's friend's friend

[00:21:27] [SPEAKER_02]: mom told me why don't you go so I remember going to her office and I said listen I'm just here

[00:21:32] [SPEAKER_02]: because you know my mom and whatever and I'm gonna bounce in two months and okay but for two

[00:21:38] [SPEAKER_02]: months I'll just like hang out and she said okay but I think the universe had a crazy plan

[00:21:43] [SPEAKER_02]: so while we were doing that I was I started getting introduced to all of this in a very

[00:21:48] [SPEAKER_02]: technical way if I say technical as in you know a very structured way like you know how you do

[00:21:53] [SPEAKER_02]: practice things but you don't know what it is you're like having thoughts like how people

[00:21:56] [SPEAKER_02]: speak about manifestation do one thing and then I realized I remember writing something down

[00:22:01] [SPEAKER_02]: which said you know what it made me realize what my eventual goal was I wanted to have a heart

[00:22:07] [SPEAKER_02]: of gold okay yeah and I don't know where it came from and through the process I realized

[00:22:12] [SPEAKER_02]: like there was so much decluttering happening like with terms of friends were going coming

[00:22:17] [SPEAKER_02]: I started becoming a little bit more meaningful authenticity started coming by just practicing

[00:22:23] [SPEAKER_02]: and one of the basic things I would say was also gratitude like we give it and I keep telling people

[00:22:30] [SPEAKER_02]: that it seems very small but it's really changed my life I've practiced it for I think 15 years

[00:22:35] [SPEAKER_06]: now every single day of my life so you do you do like a process for it or how's it

[00:22:42] [SPEAKER_02]: so I now have a morning routine you have a routine what is it yeah so I wake up I have I love the

[00:22:48] [SPEAKER_02]: mirror exercise where you go in front of the mirror this is for you know I self love I'm obsessed

[00:22:52] [SPEAKER_02]: with myself I love myself a lot and I so and it's I made it very simple because I leave a

[00:22:58] [SPEAKER_02]: very busy life like I'm obsessed with my son I'm obsessed with my husband yeah I'm obsessed

[00:23:03] [SPEAKER_02]: with you know friends and family I'm that kind I'm a relationship person to cut it short but with

[00:23:08] [SPEAKER_02]: all of that then comes my most important relationship that's with me but you know you're rushing

[00:23:13] [SPEAKER_02]: and everything so I just do a very quick morning routine while while I'm brushing I look at the

[00:23:19] [SPEAKER_02]: mirror and I keep praising myself what an amazing mother you are what a great I love you and like

[00:23:25] [SPEAKER_02]: that connect yeah then I quickly write my gratitude read just like four five pages of

[00:23:31] [SPEAKER_02]: something yeah whatever it is it can also be on my phone yeah and do my affirmations like

[00:23:37] [SPEAKER_02]: and set an intention and I love blessing my water for the day that's at night or morning

[00:23:42] [SPEAKER_02]: morning as I wake up like you know what you wake up to drink water yeah so I was feeling before

[00:23:47] [SPEAKER_02]: you yeah so I will fill a bottle of water and that's how the day starts so when I'm sipping

[00:23:51] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm going with that intention and like this is not negotiable for me this is something this

[00:23:57] [SPEAKER_02]: would take what how much time hardly sticks like five to seven minutes and of course I do a little

[00:24:01] [SPEAKER_02]: three deep breaths this is my easiest quickest so like it's seven to fifteen seven yeah seven to

[00:24:07] [SPEAKER_02]: ten minutes it's I've kept it really short because you know what happens I through the day I can go

[00:24:13] [SPEAKER_02]: it go a little you know deeper in it but as I wake up even this is not negotiable yeah this

[00:24:18] [SPEAKER_02]: is not negotiable for me got it like I've got to do this yeah and it's very doable yeah it's

[00:24:25] [SPEAKER_02]: very doable so the consistency is not a problem with something like this for me yeah and I know

[00:24:30] [SPEAKER_02]: if I don't do this then I don't feel good and of course on a good day when you have time

[00:24:33] [SPEAKER_02]: then I go in a deeper meditation I can go into deeper things but otherwise also just doing this

[00:24:39] [SPEAKER_02]: I think has made a lot of difference in the way I I like rewire myself as I wake up understood

[00:24:46] [SPEAKER_06]: and this you've been at it for 15 years now yes and this fundamentally is game changer for

[00:24:51] [SPEAKER_06]: you game changer I think amazing on 10 minutes of ritual if I can call it yeah which is

[00:24:59] [SPEAKER_06]: self praise self love affirmations and just connecting with yourself it's not opening any

[00:25:06] [SPEAKER_06]: gadgets nothing no other thought coming to your mind it's with you with you in the first 10

[00:25:12] [SPEAKER_02]: minutes like gratitude you which makes you realize how amazing even yesterday was I was living a

[00:25:16] [SPEAKER_02]: good life then you go to like praising yourself because you know what happens as we started off

[00:25:21] [SPEAKER_02]: you know the way you see yourself is the way the world sees you exactly and but when I wake up

[00:25:26] [SPEAKER_02]: like feeling oops wishes I are not looking good and this is what I'm gonna see but when I see

[00:25:30] [SPEAKER_02]: the mirror and you know so many times I think marriage is also I think I'm in a great marriage

[00:25:35] [SPEAKER_02]: because of something like this I don't wait for my husband to compliment me because in the morning

[00:25:38] [SPEAKER_02]: I tell myself you're the most amazing wife like he's so blessed to have you so there is no

[00:25:43] [SPEAKER_02]: room for you know expectations because otherwise we are seeking and then comes your affirmations

[00:25:50] [SPEAKER_02]: like you know I know if I'm gonna have a busy day or there's something on my mind which I want to

[00:25:55] [SPEAKER_02]: like now fix there's a limiting belief which is going maybe that you know what maybe you can't do it

[00:25:58] [SPEAKER_02]: for example today morning if I was coming on this podcast I would say you know just I gonna

[00:26:02] [SPEAKER_02]: be amazing at this podcast just simply saying that three deep breaths just because we don't

[00:26:09] [SPEAKER_02]: breathe I don't know you heard that like we're breathing wrong so it's just like the three

[00:26:13] [SPEAKER_02]: deep breaths just get you connected and reading something nice is I do not watch news I do not

[00:26:18] [SPEAKER_02]: I don't even know what's happening in the world I'm very sorry to say like I have no idea

[00:26:22] [SPEAKER_02]: because that's negativity it's like would you know apps nothing on your phone of course I have my

[00:26:26] [SPEAKER_02]: Instagram I have all of it but I choose not to watch whatever like for example even Instagram

[00:26:31] [SPEAKER_02]: if some even a friend of mine is posting that you know this is happening and world is this

[00:26:35] [SPEAKER_02]: I wouldn't watch it it's not that I want to be aloof it's just that I know

[00:26:39] [SPEAKER_02]: if I think of it I know I'm gonna manifest my own vibrations and your frequency will get

[00:26:44] [SPEAKER_02]: affected and my vocabulary okay that too talk about it so vocabulary I feel for me

[00:26:52] [SPEAKER_02]: what really changed when I fixed my vocabulary it's my vocabulary is extremely simple super simple

[00:26:58] [SPEAKER_02]: but it doesn't have words which would you know like be negative in terms of I can't do every word

[00:27:05] [SPEAKER_02]: as a frequency and it again I keep it very simple I just watch my vocabulary to be really positive

[00:27:12] [SPEAKER_02]: because you know when your words how you speak like for example I wake up and say I'm really lazy

[00:27:18] [SPEAKER_02]: how your how what your thoughts are is how you feel so I felt lazy so I'm going to be lazy

[00:27:23] [SPEAKER_02]: and you send the signal to the body but imagine I wake up I said you know what I want to

[00:27:27] [SPEAKER_02]: like nap for 10 minutes yeah but after that I'm going to be energetic I just fixed my whole

[00:27:33] [SPEAKER_02]: morning by just saying the so you know I think vocabulary is so important that we don't really

[00:27:41] [SPEAKER_02]: you know pay too much attention it's a simplest thing that's exactly why I get out of you so

[00:27:46] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm grateful for this this this then your vocabulary shifts when you start seeing your

[00:27:50] [SPEAKER_02]: vocabulary shifts you start seeing your environment shift yeah you wouldn't watch thriller movies

[00:27:54] [SPEAKER_02]: action I do I do when I say negative see eyes I have a very happening life apart from this

[00:28:01] [SPEAKER_02]: exactly why keep everything super simple because you know what otherwise life has to blend it

[00:28:06] [SPEAKER_02]: integrate has to integrate because I don't I just don't want life to happen to me I

[00:28:10] [SPEAKER_02]: I know it's happening for me but for it to happen for me at least I need to be in awareness

[00:28:15] [SPEAKER_02]: of things which I can avoid when I know like taking a newspaper and seeing someone being

[00:28:19] [SPEAKER_02]: murdered or raped is not going to add to anything yes and I know I really can't do

[00:28:24] [SPEAKER_06]: anything about it less about example what the circle of influence they say right like

[00:28:29] [SPEAKER_06]: if my circle of influence is my family first of course it's me then it's my family it's my office

[00:28:36] [SPEAKER_06]: it's my people connected to me let's say for me it's in Marshall but beyond that if I start

[00:28:43] [SPEAKER_06]: worrying about my relatives in America and if they need me right now and if I'm not available

[00:28:47] [SPEAKER_06]: and start feeling guilty about it that's not the right exact approach to take that's negative

[00:28:52] [SPEAKER_02]: approach and you know what the problem is we're worrying unless you're doing something so

[00:28:56] [SPEAKER_02]: you know when I'm worrying about someone I'm only sending you more negative energy or energy

[00:29:00] [SPEAKER_02]: for loopholes this happens unless it's not going to help them unless I think you know what in this

[00:29:05] [SPEAKER_02]: aspect something is and I know you know universe has its way if I if I know I can help in that

[00:29:11] [SPEAKER_02]: aspect it anyways comes to me so in that way if I can do something for you it's going to show

[00:29:16] [SPEAKER_02]: up on my as an opportunity in my life but apart from that as a sign or as a sign yeah it's

[00:29:22] [SPEAKER_02]: going to show up it's going to might just show up in my feed when I don't even read it will still

[00:29:25] [SPEAKER_02]: show up and I would resonate with it yeah but apart from that I'm only sending in more energy

[00:29:30] [SPEAKER_02]: which is not helping someone for example you know when covid was happening everybody would just

[00:29:34] [SPEAKER_02]: call each other and say oh my god you've got it are you okay you didn't help the person you

[00:29:40] [SPEAKER_02]: just made them you freak them out like I like oops they're gonna come and get you yeah and

[00:29:46] [SPEAKER_02]: and you're like oh this happened to me and this happened you didn't really really help someone

[00:29:50] [SPEAKER_02]: unless you call them and you know tell them hey listen you know what I'm sure you're gonna be fine

[00:29:54] [SPEAKER_06]: you'll be fine exercise or whatever yeah and you know what in fact this is just going to kill

[00:29:57] [SPEAKER_02]: all the cells and you're going to wear these cells and you're going to come out of it like a

[00:30:00] [SPEAKER_02]: new person and create a new fantastic meaning for it if you can't do that don't at least make

[00:30:07] [SPEAKER_06]: them worse that's my belief so you are talking about frequency right the what I'm listening

[00:30:12] [SPEAKER_06]: throughout the talk now is about vibration yes and frequency and how you keep it up yes

[00:30:19] [SPEAKER_06]: and you have hacks and you have some techniques and you've been training yourself doing courses

[00:30:24] [SPEAKER_06]: and that's what you're teaching your students as well but I think what you're trying to do also is

[00:30:29] [SPEAKER_06]: Rishita if I'm getting it right is making it simple yes whatever you're teaching them is

[00:30:35] [SPEAKER_06]: it's simple hacks not like really laborious rituals to be conducted for half an hour one

[00:30:41] [SPEAKER_02]: hour two hours yes because I know that doesn't work I've also tried to do them I've also

[00:30:45] [SPEAKER_02]: failed because you know the lives we live and I know the genre I speak to is all people in my

[00:30:53] [SPEAKER_02]: wedding time in hand and then you know what happens we just ignore it so I like to keep it really simple

[00:30:58] [SPEAKER_02]: that I listen just do this and you're gonna be okay like you don't really need to do too much

[00:31:03] [SPEAKER_02]: it's super simple and that's what I say if I can do it anybody can do it because

[00:31:07] [SPEAKER_06]: I'm a living example of keeping it the simplest with this simple hack you visualize your son's eyes

[00:31:14] [SPEAKER_02]: yes so I tell my son you're like my walking talking

[00:31:22] [SPEAKER_02]: you know example of what how things can really go get manifested so you visualized his golden hair

[00:31:30] [SPEAKER_02]: and gray eyes yes and the eye needs and I visualized there was one cute little picture of this guy

[00:31:35] [SPEAKER_02]: is having gray eyes golden hair and hair was less that time I didn't think about it I'm already

[00:31:41] [SPEAKER_02]: disclaiming it because people are visualizing you need to know it needs to be to the tea and my

[00:31:45] [SPEAKER_02]: son poor thing came with very little hair very golden but very little okay so I realized the amount of

[00:31:50] [SPEAKER_02]: energy I put into it I've got exactly but even that happened so you know exactly when you're

[00:31:55] [SPEAKER_02]: actually visualizing and manifesting you really need to put your energy yeah I think through it

[00:32:01] [SPEAKER_02]: very vivid yeah and you have to think through it you can't like be like okay you know what this

[00:32:05] [SPEAKER_02]: and again while I was manifesting I you know it's like an it's an art okay it's an art of I believe

[00:32:14] [SPEAKER_02]: that it's like an art where you first need to really believe for that you know image to become a reality

[00:32:20] [SPEAKER_02]: like you really need to know that I don't care and every single time a doubt appears you need to

[00:32:25] [SPEAKER_02]: be like that's not happening to me because every single time I would say gray eyes I would say

[00:32:30] [SPEAKER_02]: when nobody has it nobody this and I would like yeah nobody has it but he's a special one and you

[00:32:36] [SPEAKER_02]: know create new meanings into it it's almost like living in the unicorn world I say like you know

[00:32:41] [SPEAKER_02]: if you're with the universe you've got to believe there's a world of your own where there is no

[00:32:46] [SPEAKER_02]: room for doubts and every single time someone comes to me and they tell me oh but you know

[00:32:50] [SPEAKER_02]: what this can also happen which is honestly maybe the practical way I always say but if

[00:32:55] [SPEAKER_02]: we were going to be practical we would not be manifesting something so you know unique

[00:33:00] [SPEAKER_02]: there's some magic in life you know you're creating yeah you're creating magic so you need to know the

[00:33:05] [SPEAKER_02]: if you want you have to also believe in the impossible a little bit in terms that like believe

[00:33:10] [SPEAKER_02]: truly and I say impossible that doesn't mean like I want to go into the moon no that's not

[00:33:15] [SPEAKER_02]: maybe yes if you really believe that's what's happening.

[00:33:17] [SPEAKER_06]: Visualization manifestation has become like now the first time I heard about this was back

[00:33:22] [SPEAKER_06]: in those days when secret book had come out right they spoke about it and there were manuals

[00:33:28] [SPEAKER_06]: given along with it and you couldn't do those practical exercises I've tried it myself

[00:33:32] [SPEAKER_06]: vision both has worked it's worked like really how 100% I would say 80 to 100% not 100% maybe

[00:33:41] [SPEAKER_06]: but it works yeah so when you're visualizing your son's gray eyes and I'm still stuck on that

[00:33:48] [SPEAKER_02]: why gray and why golden I just want I'm obsessed with gray eyes I'm obsessed like I'm no one in the

[00:33:55] [SPEAKER_02]: family had it no one in the family had it but I just wanted it like you know what when I was actually

[00:34:01] [SPEAKER_02]: having them are my whole idea was it was not even like I was in attracting I knew by then I'd

[00:34:06] [SPEAKER_02]: understood that you know it's it's a very sacred process where oh it's believed that you know

[00:34:12] [SPEAKER_02]: why you're conceiving why just when you have the thought that I want to have a baby you've already

[00:34:17] [SPEAKER_02]: conceived the baby okay like it's out there and then that soul comes into you like the soul chose me

[00:34:26] [SPEAKER_02]: hmm Nehmer could have chosen anybody but he chose me so when I so I think I had a lot of

[00:34:32] [SPEAKER_02]: respect to this whole process like even today I think I really have so much love and respect

[00:34:39] [SPEAKER_02]: for my son is because I know it's not easy you know for a soul to then choose me to come here

[00:34:44] [SPEAKER_02]: and to you know trust in me and I was wanting the best and in my head the best verse like gray eyes

[00:34:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I said you have to the child has to look very cute like you know the cuteness in my angle

[00:34:57] [SPEAKER_02]: was having colored eyes gray fair guy and so that's exactly how the whole gray eye process

[00:35:05] [SPEAKER_06]: and you have a very cute baby thank you so much it's very handsome thank you okay so um

[00:35:12] [SPEAKER_02]: and this you did throughout the pregnancy throughout my pregnancy I think throughout the pregnancy I had

[00:35:17] [SPEAKER_02]: a lot of chatting I would do with my son I would also like you know talking to him talking to him

[00:35:22] [SPEAKER_06]: like I think Nehmer is my soul connect I did the same I was I was telling you about it like I

[00:35:28] [SPEAKER_06]: had a visualization meditation which I used to do and every day and it's almost like you're having

[00:35:35] [SPEAKER_06]: that conversation continuously and the child is talking back to you and especially when they start

[00:35:40] [SPEAKER_02]: kicking then you know there is a response yes so I think that's how it is like with him it was

[00:35:46] [SPEAKER_02]: speaking to him like to an extent that there were there's like this guy three months I used to say

[00:35:51] [SPEAKER_02]: when I used to go to sleep and even today he's five and a half but you know like it really

[00:35:56] [SPEAKER_02]: connects to him you know statements which would like you know make him believe that I'm around and

[00:36:02] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to handle it like I know even today the bond we share like he can trust completely

[00:36:07] [SPEAKER_02]: it's all through the womb because once he was out there was only this much and you know how we

[00:36:11] [SPEAKER_02]: think they are very tiny what are they going to understand I think the womb learning with

[00:36:16] [SPEAKER_02]: Nehmer was one of the most profound thing which I've ever experienced as a mother because I honestly

[00:36:23] [SPEAKER_02]: did it with very little understanding okay up until you don't experience I always believe that I

[00:36:28] [SPEAKER_02]: you know teach what I follow yeah but this I had never experienced so I was just like randomly

[00:36:33] [SPEAKER_02]: like whatever I knew I would just do yeah like I would like talk to my child I would be doing

[00:36:39] [SPEAKER_02]: affirmations for him I would be like even while I was nursing him he was a preterm child

[00:36:45] [SPEAKER_02]: every time I would nurse him I would say that you know what I'm going to grow strong

[00:36:50] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm going to grow I love Chubby kids I wanted Chubby and he was like 1.8 kgs when he was out

[00:36:55] [SPEAKER_02]: to an extent for three months from the time he was born my doctor had to look at me and says

[00:37:01] [SPEAKER_02]: please stop it he's he's going to be obese and I said this is magic to my ears so you know

[00:37:07] [SPEAKER_02]: like it really worked so much and once I saw that I said this is really magic like you know

[00:37:14] [SPEAKER_02]: if this is what you can give your child like of course I can't protect him from whatever he

[00:37:18] [SPEAKER_02]: has to experience he's going to fall he's going to fail he's going to do everything he's going

[00:37:21] [SPEAKER_02]: to make his own share of mistakes but I know he's going to do it way better than I did because

[00:37:26] [SPEAKER_02]: he's going to be emotionally way more profound with a better perspective in life to handle them a

[00:37:33] [SPEAKER_06]: better way yeah so conscious parenting yes yeah and you have your courses around this now

[00:37:39] [SPEAKER_06]: are you teaching mothers you're teaching to be mothers and mothers who already mothers

[00:37:44] [SPEAKER_02]: to raise their kids consciously yeah I'm teaching mothers who are pregnant like I'm doing

[00:37:49] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah holistic pregnancies my course and in the room the husband also comes yes so I have a whole

[00:37:56] [SPEAKER_02]: oh you know portion where it's with the partner very nice because he says I love that men have

[00:38:01] [SPEAKER_02]: become so involved they've become so sweet yes so why not yeah lovely and you've been

[00:38:06] [SPEAKER_02]: doing this for a couple of years now so honestly I've been doing a lot of life coaching

[00:38:11] [SPEAKER_02]: but pregnancy coaching I've gotten to very very actively around two and a half years ago

[00:38:17] [SPEAKER_06]: and why do you think couples are wanting to learn more about holistic so for me honestly

[00:38:22] [SPEAKER_02]: I aim more at the mother because she is it's very interesting you know if you've noticed

[00:38:29] [SPEAKER_02]: animals when they are born have you noticed they come out and they start walking in

[00:38:34] [SPEAKER_02]: the hours yeah but human beings and we are the most with the smartest species in the world

[00:38:40] [SPEAKER_02]: but we can't do it yes yes because the reason being is that you know what we come and we are very

[00:38:48] [SPEAKER_02]: adaptive so we are learning through and through for the first five years that's why people have

[00:38:54] [SPEAKER_02]: started becoming so aware that for the first five years is where you're developing like

[00:38:58] [SPEAKER_02]: you cannot put a giraffe in the Antarctic and say now you live he's not going to but you

[00:39:03] [SPEAKER_02]: can put a guy who's born in Sahara desert in the Antarctic and he's still survived because that's

[00:39:08] [SPEAKER_02]: how adaptive human beings are and when I say this you know when your child is growing and now your

[00:39:14] [SPEAKER_02]: child is learning the first point of contact is always the mother starting from the womb

[00:39:19] [SPEAKER_02]: absolutely so you know what your mother really needs to be cleansed like for example how my

[00:39:24] [SPEAKER_02]: mother gifted it to me yeah I was very conscious that I do want to give this to my child okay

[00:39:28] [SPEAKER_02]: so my focus is with the mothers that you know with so many times we feel yeah it's okay

[00:39:33] [SPEAKER_02]: and I'm not talking about you having an issue if you don't need to have issues it's just about

[00:39:38] [SPEAKER_02]: conscious parenting yeah you just need to be aware you need to love yourself a little bit more

[00:39:43] [SPEAKER_02]: you need to understand who you are yeah to take care of another child because before that

[00:39:48] [SPEAKER_02]: it was only about you now it's about two yeah and you know but still if I so many times I

[00:39:53] [SPEAKER_02]: ask everybody like hey who are you and they're like struggling we don't know who we are and

[00:39:57] [SPEAKER_02]: now we are wanting to raise a child so exactly why we get frustrated we get you know annoyed because

[00:40:03] [SPEAKER_02]: so my whole course is about first discovering your new self it's like nine months I feel like

[00:40:09] [SPEAKER_02]: a training ground for a mother yeah to actually get closer to herself so that she can get

[00:40:14] [SPEAKER_02]: because I think I was so aware about who I am and I love myself I'm you know centred

[00:40:20] [SPEAKER_02]: you know I don't lose it yeah like it's like you know if your pot has tea and I tell you

[00:40:24] [SPEAKER_06]: please pour me coffee you can't yeah right and I said you know I think it's a golden opportunity

[00:40:29] [SPEAKER_06]: given to women to be the right hand of God yes I love that I say that why I say that is

[00:40:35] [SPEAKER_06]: I mean what I have experience in pregnancy right so the child doesn't really have a personality

[00:40:42] [SPEAKER_06]: or they don't even have they can't move and they can't talk and they can't walk or anything

[00:40:47] [SPEAKER_06]: and they say that they go through their past life right they're remembering remembering things

[00:40:54] [SPEAKER_06]: but their intuitive power or the conscious power which in all spirituality which we are seeking

[00:41:00] [SPEAKER_06]: is there in a newborn child especially with the first six months so first six months their

[00:41:05] [SPEAKER_06]: spiritual energy is at the highest and if as a mother you are next to that child means you're

[00:41:11] [SPEAKER_06]: the right hand of God because it's God's child and you are taking care of that being

[00:41:16] [SPEAKER_06]: who's just come in this world and I think it's just to observe that kid grow into somebody as a

[00:41:24] [SPEAKER_06]: personality from a nobody and then try to go back to nobody again from a personality it's

[00:41:31] [SPEAKER_06]: it's I think it is what what we are here yeah you know we are discussing on this forum

[00:41:36] [SPEAKER_06]: multiple times we all have come with a nobody tag but then the societies put different labels

[00:41:43] [SPEAKER_06]: labels labels labels and then we are only taking the labels off I would agree doing these courses

[00:41:48] [SPEAKER_06]: chalo yeh label nikhaal I'm not this I'm not this I'm not this then what am I what you were born

[00:41:54] [SPEAKER_06]: with buddy going back exactly go back to the source and learning is learning yeah and that

[00:42:01] [SPEAKER_06]: that's I'm saying you know it's it's such a profound experience to be a mother and really

[00:42:06] [SPEAKER_06]: blessed anybody who's a mother and gone through that experience it's it's divine and talking about work

[00:42:14] [SPEAKER_06]: and taking break from work I think you should take break from work six months one year whatever it is

[00:42:19] [SPEAKER_06]: because that time is very different from any other part of your life because we are talking

[00:42:24] [SPEAKER_06]: about postpartum period is kicking in I'm fat and you know hormones are playing the havoc

[00:42:32] [SPEAKER_06]: for their playing but it's also the experience of looking at this being grow along with you

[00:42:38] [SPEAKER_02]: you know I will never come back also I think because we get we have so many expectations

[00:42:44] [SPEAKER_02]: from myself that's why postpartum also too much yeah too many these days you go to school and

[00:42:49] [SPEAKER_02]: mothers are like so what do you do and you're like what if I just want to be a mother that's

[00:42:56] [SPEAKER_06]: a job yeah and that someone asked me when I took time off and I told this lady that

[00:43:03] [SPEAKER_06]: yeah you know I took a sabbatical she said don't call it sabbatical it's not a sabbatical you

[00:43:09] [SPEAKER_06]: you were a full-time mother taking care of your child it's it's a hell of a job that is a job

[00:43:14] [SPEAKER_06]: you were doing a job for yourself for your family for your father kid I'm like yeah it's

[00:43:19] [SPEAKER_06]: a bad that's a wrong thing to say it's a bad literally you know so yeah you know I think for

[00:43:26] [SPEAKER_06]: all women out there just do what's the need of the arm and not worry whether things will work out or

[00:43:32] [SPEAKER_06]: not universe will make things work out if you really are in the right space and place and heart

[00:43:38] [SPEAKER_06]: the universe will make you I would agree things work out for you

[00:43:42] [SPEAKER_06]: and yeah I think that that's exactly what you yes all your clients about exactly that's

[00:43:47] [SPEAKER_02]: what I keep saying that you know what the thing is that we fall into these traps of wanting too much

[00:43:52] [SPEAKER_02]: being too much and and then we have a baby and then we get more when because in already too much

[00:43:59] [SPEAKER_02]: life now we have another responsibility but you know when you're pregnant if you just slow down to

[00:44:04] [SPEAKER_02]: really understand what you truly want so that's an opportunity that's a time to realize that

[00:44:10] [SPEAKER_02]: understand what you really want what your priorities because you know for me I think

[00:44:14] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm a relationship person so I know it comparison to if it's work and relationship I'm

[00:44:19] [SPEAKER_02]: definitely going to choose that so I you know set my goals in that way where I'm not saying that

[00:44:25] [SPEAKER_02]: you know it's going to be in MR's birthday but I'm going to have my webinar happening today

[00:44:30] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm clashing it so understanding where my priorities are and aligning my goals towards that

[00:44:36] [SPEAKER_02]: and then not feeling over and because you know when you set yourself too high is when

[00:44:40] [SPEAKER_02]: you're getting disappointed in yourself and that's when you're feeling you're not good enough

[00:44:44] [SPEAKER_02]: self doubt and post-mortem also happens a lot because of that because you're feeling lost

[00:44:50] [SPEAKER_02]: so while in the nine months you understand that this is my time to you're never going to go back

[00:44:54] [SPEAKER_02]: in body mind emotionally to you never let's accept it but now there's a new version what's

[00:45:02] [SPEAKER_02]: the goodness it's coming let's like ample that like I knew when I put on like 22 kgs after

[00:45:07] [SPEAKER_02]: an MR you know it's easy to feel upset because this is not me but why not like rediscover a whole

[00:45:13] [SPEAKER_02]: new style of dressing me up as simple as that you know but you rather than being overwhelmed and

[00:45:19] [SPEAKER_02]: keeping on looking at the mirror and saying which the hell have you done yeah but I looked at

[00:45:23] [SPEAKER_02]: say you know what this is the time I can wear all those things I could never wear earlier

[00:45:27] [SPEAKER_02]: because you know when you're there is a beautiful style you can carry forward so I think

[00:45:32] [SPEAKER_02]: redefining it understanding it and being prepared for it you can never be prepared a hundred percent

[00:45:37] [SPEAKER_02]: but at least have a little awareness of you know what it's going to be this way and I know

[00:45:44] [SPEAKER_02]: emotionally I'm ready to take it and even then if it's like 10% 20% or just 2%

[00:45:51] [SPEAKER_02]: you can deal with it because you're emotionally ready it's as simple as that you know emotions

[00:45:57] [SPEAKER_02]: kick in that's why we say we're harm only yeah so just like you know analyzing that stage like

[00:46:03] [SPEAKER_02]: when I was pregnant I never threw up I never had morning sickness and I would say it's all

[00:46:07] [SPEAKER_02]: thanks to the mindset yeah and it was such a beautiful pregnancy do an extent that like

[00:46:14] [SPEAKER_06]: you're enjoying it right you were in the moment and completely connected connect it

[00:46:18] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah so and I really wish that women really enjoy this because it's one of the best faces

[00:46:25] [SPEAKER_02]: of your life why wouldn't you want it any other way and this is the time you get your child

[00:46:30] [SPEAKER_02]: exclusively to yourself that is so true so why not like get that bond going so strong

[00:46:37] [SPEAKER_06]: that then you have it for life visualization boards let's talk about that well you have

[00:46:46] [SPEAKER_06]: workshops around it yes I do so there's a process so you know yes there's a process

[00:46:53] [SPEAKER_02]: and I teach you how to do this it's about you know like aiming at every sphere of your life

[00:46:58] [SPEAKER_02]: and like having it in all in sick as I say a sink as I said you know it has to be in harmony

[00:47:04] [SPEAKER_02]: it's like the stroke of the cycle you know if like even one is bent your cycle wheel wobbles

[00:47:09] [SPEAKER_02]: and that's what happens in life at times work is going great relations but relationships are

[00:47:14] [SPEAKER_02]: not good you're not happy yeah relationships are great work is not good you're still not happy

[00:47:18] [SPEAKER_02]: so your life needs to be in momentum and a good balance at least

[00:47:23] [SPEAKER_02]: you know if it's like if I'm a seven on 10 in a particular thing at least I'm like an eight on 10

[00:47:28] [SPEAKER_02]: but not like a two on ten that's where the discrepancy comes extremes are bad

[00:47:34] [SPEAKER_02]: yes what you're saying so in the vision board first we understand how to you know prioritize

[00:47:38] [SPEAKER_02]: and align your goals and then to also see what are the limiting beliefs I own because you know

[00:47:46] [SPEAKER_02]: while I'm saying I want to do this maybe I'm not ready like I know for a matter of fact like when

[00:47:51] [SPEAKER_02]: I had an MR I had to give myself five years to now be out there and starting to travel or doing what

[00:47:56] [SPEAKER_02]: I needed to do because I knew I wasn't ready but I can't look at the universe and complain and

[00:48:01] [SPEAKER_02]: blame that hey you didn't give it to me but I wouldn't have taken it yes like even if the

[00:48:06] [SPEAKER_02]: opportunity would have come I wouldn't have taken it huh and being very specific about what you want

[00:48:12] [SPEAKER_02]: in your vision board when you say that I've heard this a couple of times like for example you know I

[00:48:16] [SPEAKER_02]: you know people keep saying I want to be rich no rich for me and you itself is very different

[00:48:21] [SPEAKER_02]: rich for someone down the road will be very different and then God gives us like an amount

[00:48:27] [SPEAKER_02]: of two three lakhs and then you're like but I'm not feeling rich this is nothing yeah and then

[00:48:32] [SPEAKER_02]: but whether universe listened to you but now the problem is like you wouldn't say what rich

[00:48:36] [SPEAKER_02]: means to you and every word has a very different like it's the most thing everybody I say will be

[00:48:43] [SPEAKER_02]: like I want to just be happy now it's divine happiness with what how yeah and you know what

[00:48:49] [SPEAKER_02]: visualize what happens yes so you know what when your when your goals are first we write down our

[00:48:54] [SPEAKER_02]: goals okay once the goals are written then we start making the affirmations about them

[00:48:59] [SPEAKER_02]: dealing with the self doubt and then going into the visualization understood the problem is like

[00:49:04] [SPEAKER_02]: you know if you are it works even when you put it down and believe it I wouldn't say and the beauty

[00:49:10] [SPEAKER_02]: of the manifestation and the vision board is it works very differently for different people

[00:49:16] [SPEAKER_02]: like maybe this method works for you so I give you this whole elaborate method yeah and then

[00:49:21] [SPEAKER_02]: you will again find out your favorite step on how you do it okay and you'll stick up to it but I

[00:49:27] [SPEAKER_02]: always believe that like when my client goes out they need to have a vision board with the

[00:49:30] [SPEAKER_02]: affirmations and with a general idea of you know what belief system they have about that

[00:49:38] [SPEAKER_06]: particular workshop takes how many days it's just six four hours four hours yes it's a weekend

[00:49:44] [SPEAKER_02]: yeah it's a weekend so of course if you want to go more intense then you then I take them one on one

[00:49:49] [SPEAKER_02]: or in a group session okay but like to get your vision board like ready it just takes four hours

[00:49:54] [SPEAKER_06]: and is it supposed to be a secret or you can put it in your room where everybody can see it

[00:49:59] [SPEAKER_02]: I love to share so you put it in a bedroom so the beauty is you know when I once I wanted to

[00:50:05] [SPEAKER_02]: we were me and my husband were traveling and we were like flying in and out of Amsterdam and

[00:50:10] [SPEAKER_02]: of course you know how you fly out of one place and then you go to the others and thankfully I

[00:50:14] [SPEAKER_02]: put my vision board out there because I had grease in it I really wanted to go to Santroni

[00:50:19] [SPEAKER_02]: so he came inside and he looked at it and he said baby really want to do this I said yes

[00:50:24] [SPEAKER_02]: he said yeah from Amsterdam we can go take a flight and we can do this I said I would love to

[00:50:28] [SPEAKER_02]: my vision would work some seconds so it's like you know what I would say that you know

[00:50:33] [SPEAKER_02]: short to people who you know are going to be a part of it you know comfortable about it

[00:50:37] [SPEAKER_02]: like you don't want to put it out there and I know few people again then get self-doubt because

[00:50:42] [SPEAKER_02]: people laugh at your goals so don't do that but like in your safe environment in your safe space

[00:50:48] [SPEAKER_02]: please go it because also people help you like whenever I do these sessions it's usually in

[00:50:53] [SPEAKER_02]: a group and it's so happens so many times that one woman will be like oh you want this I have this

[00:50:59] [SPEAKER_02]: can I help you with this and I've noticed like you know what visions become reality just by putting

[00:51:04] [SPEAKER_02]: it out there and just sharing it with the such a close circle and that's why I love to do this

[00:51:08] [SPEAKER_02]: vision board session in groups because it already creates magic because when I look at you I'm

[00:51:13] [SPEAKER_02]: also sending you good energy right to your goal so it's it's a good safe it makes sense

[00:51:18] [SPEAKER_06]: when you're coming for a purpose to a workshop but not people who are not your well-fisher exactly

[00:51:24] [SPEAKER_06]: they get to know about your plans okay save your vision boards guys okay no but it's really powerful

[00:51:34] [SPEAKER_06]: jokes apart it's really really powerful I'm all for visualization manifestation a vision boards

[00:51:42] [SPEAKER_06]: positive affirmations and having a daily routine like your routine is for like seven to

[00:51:47] [SPEAKER_06]: ten minutes it really doesn't matter people can have 15 minutes 25 30 as long as you're taking

[00:51:53] [SPEAKER_06]: out time for yourself yes right because that's the most important person in your life which is

[00:51:58] [SPEAKER_06]: yourself connect every morning before you set foot out so lovely having you on the show

[00:52:05] [SPEAKER_06]: thank you so much at such a you know yeah this is just beautiful we manifested you on the show

[00:52:12] [SPEAKER_06]: I told you what's on my mobile right yes I showed it to her

[00:52:16] [SPEAKER_06]: I love it yeah so lovely you have any you want to define unstoppable spirit in your own words

[00:52:24] [SPEAKER_02]: for me I think you know what keep just doing what makes you happy and you're going to be

[00:52:28] [SPEAKER_02]: unstoppable is what I feel so seek your happiness seek your happiness and follow it

[00:52:34] [SPEAKER_02]: okay like you know when you find it a lot of us lose it again don't lose it

[00:52:37] [SPEAKER_02]: just keep going going because you know I think as women so many times what happens is

[00:52:43] [SPEAKER_02]: you get carried away because there's so much more many people you want to keep happy

[00:52:48] [SPEAKER_02]: and that's when you lose yourself so for me I think the unstoppable spirit is don't lose

[00:52:53] [SPEAKER_02]: yourself in the journey of being there for others you can be there for others in fact a little

[00:53:00] [SPEAKER_06]: bit more when you're there for yourself lovely lovely thank you so much thank you so much