Dr. Meghana Dikshit’s Truths on Pain, Clarity, and Manifestation

[00:00:00] Every time the pain comes don't run away, dance and celebrate as it's an opportunity for you to grow in your life.

[00:00:07] That's a perspective shift that you have to bring in yourself. It's not an obstacle, it's an opportunity.

[00:00:30] Ask my guest about it. We do not ask you about what do you feel we don't understand about ourselves or rather we are not taught from the time when we are children to become older, which actually leads to all the need for us to need some form of therapy,

[00:00:51] we are not taught how to cope with the situation, which is an adverse situation. We are always told to react in the situation either by aggressively attacking it or by reacting to keep it under the carpet.

[00:01:12] I think the copup mechanism is something that is not taught. What's the healthy copup? How do you deal with something that didn't go well for you?

[00:01:20] That is something big time missing in society where most of the responsibility comes on to parents to deal with or teach their children to do it that way.

[00:01:32] The schools don't take the responsibility of it. There is nothing in the education system about it. I understand that there is something that they will probably help you with, but even at home if you see Varun, I don't think the parents are equipped because their parents were not equipped.

[00:01:48] I don't think there is a manual to parenting and life itself. We are all trying to figure out we are all 8 billion plus people in this world, and I think every, not a single person will have the same way of dealing with the situation.

[00:02:03] That is the most important thing that is missing.

[00:02:08] Also what comes with not knowing is there is an added pressure on the parent to make sure we will have kids who think about your own childhood.

[00:02:20] You are seeing kids going through the same cycle that you went through. What do I do to make sure they are not going through?

[00:02:29] What you are also realizing is repeating the same things that happened to you as well. What got you into this space of working with people to deal with the relationships in their lives and everything that they were going through?

[00:02:43] What got you into this space?

[00:02:45] My journey started as an Ayurvedic doctor in 1997. That is like 26 years back almost.

[00:02:51] Back then people would look at Ayurveda. Now also they do similar way probably, but back then it was too much that people would only look at Ayurveda as a last resort.

[00:03:01] If there is nothing happening, let's go here and see if this can come to some help.

[00:03:07] People I was a young doctor and people would come and say something.

[00:03:12] I would be like last minute how it will take place? Then they would say that there is no other way.

[00:03:18] In that journey what I got is, I think it was a blessing that I get to witness a lot of critical in this case and identifying what they really need.

[00:03:31] So dealing with fourth stage cancer probably, chronic insomnia, chronic hormonal disturbances, lifestyle disorders like diabetes, cardiovascular disorders, autoimmune disorders,

[00:03:45] MS, Lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, allergies, different sorts of allergies.

[00:03:51] So one thing led to another. I started getting really good at dealing with these chronic illnesses somehow but what I also observed is after a few days or months or years people would come back with similar symptoms.

[00:04:04] So they were not fully cured even though they could reverse it, it came back.

[00:04:09] And that got me thinking that maybe what I'm doing right now is something is missing.

[00:04:15] There's a different root cause that is causing this problem so back then there was no internet.

[00:04:20] So I couldn't check out what's happening, what other research is happening.

[00:04:24] We had to totally rely on books and we had to totally rely on our experiences.

[00:04:28] So I was trying to figure out what's happening in this people when they were and most of them were born healthy.

[00:04:35] Very rarely there was a hereditary or genetic history people were sharing that in my family, someone had cancer and my family, someone had arthritis or something like that.

[00:04:46] So I was wondering if they're born healthy, what makes them unhealthy?

[00:04:50] So body is creating something inside and obviously the toxic chemicals.

[00:04:55] So where are these toxic chemicals coming from?

[00:04:59] So then I started thinking about okay, the thought is generating the toxic chemicals, the toxic chemicals are then generating the unhealthy diseases in their body whatever that is.

[00:05:11] Maybe it started with a symptom which they ignored by taking a pill and then it continued aggravating more and more and more.

[00:05:18] And it led to this big problem now.

[00:05:21] And after that also they went to the places where the symptoms were suppressed because there was no cure to it.

[00:05:28] I don't think 25 years back people were looking at mental health and body has any connection.

[00:05:34] I think we always looked at body and mind separate.

[00:05:38] And I think that happened sometime in the 16th century.

[00:05:41] If you go back to realize that Okrana DeKart was a first scientist who separated body and mind.

[00:05:47] He said whatever is tangible comes under physics and whatever is intangible comes under religion.

[00:05:53] So I think that separated and then Newton came and proved that his theories and then we are all studying Newtonian physics.

[00:06:01] So I think we never connected the body and mind together.

[00:06:04] And that's what medical science, all medical sciences went into that.

[00:06:08] So I think that's where somewhere the key I started finding that I probably need to understand what is happening in their life or what has happened in their life in the past.

[00:06:18] So most of the people had traumatic experiences.

[00:06:21] They had lost somebody, some compromise or adjustment they had to do that had to take a detour in their life.

[00:06:29] And there was still brooding over those issues.

[00:06:33] And not just one event, some of them had constant stress in terms of financial issues, dysfunctional families, they have seen violence and physical and sexual abuse

[00:06:43] and safe environments that they were growing in.

[00:06:48] So it's kind of like I started realizing that this is where something I need to figure out.

[00:06:54] And back then I was not trained into any other modality.

[00:06:58] I was just in Ayurvedic Doctor.

[00:07:00] I can't say just in Ayurvedic Doctor because this Ayurveda has a lot but still I feel that there was a lot of missing.

[00:07:05] So then I started educating myself in various modalities to understand how do I help these people better?

[00:07:12] And when I started using those modalities, people started getting the results.

[00:07:16] They started actually reversing the cases and the interesting thing that happened is when they were reversing their cases

[00:07:23] they started coming back and saying not just my health improved but I started seeing my relationship has become better.

[00:07:28] I'm able to communicate what I'm feeling in a appropriate way without offending anybody or without taking the burden, I'm able to set the boundaries.

[00:07:36] I'm able to work harder, not procrastinate anymore.

[00:07:39] So my career is going well, money started flowing, opportunities are coming to me.

[00:07:43] And you know that's where somewhere I think the bulb on moment happened because I was also figuring it out my life that time.

[00:07:49] Because even though you are good as a doctor my personal life was not really good because I had my own whatever was going on in my mind.

[00:07:57] And that's where I started realizing that why am I waiting for people to fall sick and reach a critical stage to come to me?

[00:08:05] Why can't I take what I have understood to everybody so that they never reach a stage where they will have to find a doctor like me?

[00:08:15] And that's where the whole journey started, where I started weaving my mind and emotional work with the body.

[00:08:23] And that's where the whole journey about I could say good 15 years back.

[00:08:29] What you just said is an interesting point.

[00:08:32] Medicine and I think we looked at any form of illness as okay this is we treat it after you have it.

[00:08:40] But I feel only in recent times I've been talking about this as a preventive exercise and not just a treatment based exercise.

[00:08:48] And especially with the mind, you know it's, I remember as a kid also someone said they want to be a psychologist psychiatrist, they would say but you know who will come to you?

[00:08:58] Only crazy people will come to you right people would always say that and they've come a long way from there to really having mental health as a connoisseur not as something that is oh my god this person is going to work.

[00:09:08] You know, psychiatrist but I feel we just kind of touch the surface of understanding how what goes on to in our minds in terms of the mechanics of it.

[00:09:18] How that affects our body, how that affects how we feel, how that affects every single aspect of our lives.

[00:09:23] Do you feel as also as flipped out or understanding of how does what happens in our mind affect every aspect of who we are?

[00:09:33] Do you feel it goes beyond even where we're right right now?

[00:09:36] Absolutely I personally feel you know why don't we have a long way to go. We have come a long way I feel from last 25 years where we were but I think we have a long way to go because what I see is a typical norm people think that mental health or you're dealing with it, you're going to a therapist or something is probably a luxury.

[00:09:54] I don't think people still realize that it's not a luxury, it's mandatory. It's like you know you have your bathroom flooding.

[00:10:04] Do you fix it yourself or you call a plumber?

[00:10:07] Exactly.

[00:10:08] You have a short circuit at home, do you fix it yourself or you call an electrician?

[00:10:12] Why do you think it's different from that?

[00:10:15] You have overloaded flooding mind, you have to have a proper export to fix it for you and I don't think it's an expense.

[00:10:23] People still look at it as an expense. I think it's an investment. See we buy cars, we buy expensive gadgets, we have great laptops with us and great jewelry and all that.

[00:10:34] Do we leave it unattended or do we send it to the local garage or we send it to the right servicing center?

[00:10:41] And we have annual maintenance contract for our ACES, for our pest control.

[00:10:47] What about this? I mean this is the biggest hardware that you have and software.

[00:10:52] So when are you going to think about it as necessary? It will otherwise catch a junk and then how are you going to use that optimum?

[00:11:01] And it is catching junk and that's the reason you're having all those issues.

[00:11:05] Health issues below, relationship issues below, it's all because you've not understood yourself well.

[00:11:10] What's going on in there? Well and beyond that I think you're not understanding other people too.

[00:11:15] I think it is a mandatory subject that you have to learn since childhood how to understand yourself better and then how to understand the other person better.

[00:11:24] I think this is a foundation and it's not a luxury.

[00:11:29] No, and some of that foundation for many people like you said is the trauma they went through when they were younger.

[00:11:36] And traumas are, it can become a very generalized term that we use.

[00:11:40] We say okay this person has trauma but there's so many different levels of what someone's gone through and how it affects them.

[00:11:47] What is the understanding of what trauma does to someone's mind and how they behave especially if it happens to them when they're younger?

[00:11:55] And how does that manifest as they get older? If someone has kind of understand almost the fundamentals of it, I'd say is what I've gone through even trauma or is what I'm seeing someone going to go through.

[00:12:05] Is it that or is it and where in the spectrum does it lie?

[00:12:09] How does someone understand, begin to understand that?

[00:12:12] So if there is any memory which is especially the negative memory is in your mind alive for more than two years is a traumatic memory.

[00:12:24] That's the first thing that you have to understand.

[00:12:27] If you still remember that there is something happened in your past like I had an incident when I was eight years old where you know I had prepared my sister had made me prepare the entire speech

[00:12:39] and I really wrote learned it didn't know what it means.

[00:12:43] I'm just eight year old and I went next day for the competition and there were hundreds of people right in front of me the moment I saw them I froze.

[00:12:50] And I just started crying. Now how it turned as a trauma because at that age children are brutal.

[00:12:57] So imagine the shame, the embarrassment or the bullying that may have happened at that time because that memory was very, very vivid in my space.

[00:13:13] I think that memory altered my behavior to a large extent.

[00:13:17] I would still know, I was very good at talking one to one but I would never take opportunity to talk to many people.

[00:13:24] And it restricted me in terms of my business. It restricted me in terms of reaching out to many people.

[00:13:31] So we have to understand is there a memory beyond two years which is still alive in your space when you're sitting on your own do you go to that rabbit hole?

[00:13:41] And what goes on there? And I think every negative such imprint which is there which then has a cycle of creating negative thoughts.

[00:13:51] And those negative thoughts are then generating the negative feelings and whenever there is a negative feeling in your space whether it's anxiety,

[00:14:00] whether it's fear, whether it's procrastination, whether it's perfectionism, whether it's self-doubt and confusion.

[00:14:07] And things that go on constantly in your space are coming from the toxic chemicals. What are these toxic chemicals?

[00:14:14] The toxic chemicals are basically the stress hormones. Now the stress hormones like Adrenaline and cortisol are probably good for some time when there is a tiger in front of you.

[00:14:24] It helps you to run away or fight back right? So that's good but imagine in your mind that tiger is always there.

[00:14:31] Now your brain is releasing these toxic chemicals all the time and these toxic chemicals are pretty addictive in nature.

[00:14:39] So what happens now is very interesting like if you have seen a person who smokes they smoke a cigarette then nicotine is released in the blood

[00:14:48] they feel calm they start doing the work. After some time the nicotine is released from the blood through the sweat or other forms and the moment that dips what happens in the body?

[00:14:58] The restlessness starts, the distraction starts and the body cells now communicate to the mind, the brain that come on it's time to let that another cigarette.

[00:15:09] It's a chain reaction and these toxic chemicals are exactly having the chain reaction like that.

[00:15:16] So you may be in a toxic relationship, you may be in a toxic environment at your work, you get out of the toxic relationship or probably you change your job because your boss is not good or something something happening in your life or you get over the health issue

[00:15:32] you move on in your life and it all comes back from different set of people and you wonder what is this pattern why am I getting this pattern?

[00:15:41] It's exactly like that cigarette. So now that your problem is resolved, your adrenaline cortisol has released in the body, now there are trillions of cells of your body

[00:15:53] and they are internally screaming, hey it's time for the next one. And you go land up in the same situation again. It's pretty much that you are attracting things in your life, nobody is doing anything to you.

[00:16:06] There's so many parts of what you said I want to ask questions on but as you are talking about yourself when you were younger it reminded me of one of the things

[00:16:18] I realized through therapy has been a big factor in my life. I must have been like second standard and we had this fancy dress competition as they would call it costume competition.

[00:16:30] I would dress up as I think I was a farmer, I was going to one stage, I was going to be funny until then I was that kid who when anybody came home and go perform for them, go talk to them, always want to be on stage all that stuff.

[00:16:43] The year before I had even done like a play where I had done like two characters where I switched costumes in between. That day I got on to the stage, went front the mic and I froze, it's crying, I'm standing for crying my parents are there all the families and we got on a smaller town so most people were there, people were new.

[00:17:01] I was crying on stage and I said mom I don't want to, when I ran off stage from that day and I must have been what if I'm second standard it must be like seven eight.

[00:17:13] The next time I pushed myself to get on stage I must have been in my late 20s early 30s and even now whenever I go on stage even I do a podcast right.

[00:17:24] There's this weird stiffening at the back of my neck that happens and I went to a physio sometime back and the physio actually this is every time you get stressed your next difference so I have to go for like acupuncture and all that stuff.

[00:17:36] And what I learned the therapy is that I still haven't fully dealt with that moment on stage and it might seem like a small piece for most people to understand but it's traumatic in the sense that it pushes you away from that one action.

[00:17:51] You're watching remember what happened then run away from that so while you're talking about this I still remember that and it's something that's so imprinted in my head and very recently my daughter was on stage.

[00:18:03] First time she was in a play she was on stage she was playing the lead character in a school play.

[00:18:08] She picks up her mic and the mic isn't working and I'm sitting in front and I have frozen I am like I don't want this to happen to her but she switches on the mic.

[00:18:18] Talks normally and goes ahead and I just saw that just that moment that switch that she had versus what happened to me at least in my mind it's taken away from that what might seem like a small incident but like it's been a lifelong of residue.

[00:18:33] And people have such smaller things that they have residues of right but you might not even realize that this was traumatic for you so if I want to figure out once again you know it's it's stayed for me for this long.

[00:18:45] How do we spot triggers because from the trigger became a time and on stage so I had to realize after much many sessions of therapy that that was my biggest regret but how do I put down what my triggers are is there should we work behind from triggers or is it better to go back to things which happened in other.

[00:19:04] I feel you have to always go back to you know people shy away from it because people all I get a lot of questions like this that I would have forgotten about it why should I go back to no you're not forgotten.

[00:19:14] You're not consciously remembering it it's right there and it's alive and every time you go through and it's not one memory is just one memory you're talking about right but there must be multiple such events that it may have had every time probably you were in a crowd not necessarily you have to be on a stage.

[00:19:33] But every time there is probably more than 10 15 20 people in front of you you're going to go back to that event because see it's very important for our brain to find out what evidence is do I have from the past about this situation let me give an example like suppose this is a cup of water it's hot like I how do I know hot because the vapors are coming up right now as a child either you've seen if you're told or probably something has happened to you you have to be on the floor.

[00:20:02] Something has happened to you you've experienced that you touch something hot and you want right so every time there's a like in a from far if I see there's a weapon coming out it could be ice weapon for all you know or it could be just nitrogen yeah but I'm going to pick it up for this only I'm never going to touch it like this because I have a memory why I have that is because your brain a part of your brain is always looking out to keep you safe and comfortable and such traumatic memories are always like virus files

[00:20:32] every time you are downloading a new software it's there it's there yeah it's going to corrupt the entire system and it can it's like I always give this example of a volcano so think about it where and if there's a volcano okay and you see that there's a outlet of a volcano it's going to erupt you put a lot of tar a lot of cement and you just kind of close that outlet now what's going to happen to the volcano did it die off or did it kind of still there it's still there and it's brewing in brewing in brewing in brewing in brewing in the world.

[00:21:02] And then finally it says that I'm not getting a time to erupt here I'm not going to place to erupt here let me travel parallel because that chemical is there right so it's traveling parallel to the ground and it will erupt at a place where you don't have your focus on

[00:21:19] and that place could be your health yeah that place could be a relationship that could be your career that could be your money area yeah so all of that are those coming from those volcanoes that you didn't deal with in the past yeah

[00:21:33] so I think it's very important to go to the root cause of where it came from because when you close that first outlet everything else just has a dominoes effect and you start exponential seeing you know exponential results come exponential growth comes like I've seen in my entire programs people those who could not achieve what they wanted to achieve in 10-15 years could just do it in 90 days

[00:21:56] because you went back you close that lead you dealt with that inner child you dealt with that trauma properly appropriately you developed a great coping mechanism now your brain is going to generalize the entire thing and say hey I found that virus I fixed it now I'm going to use the antivirus for everything right and then everything fixed in 90 days your life has to change because innately I truly believe that all of us are geniuses

[00:22:25] and the moment you dust this cobwebs do you remove all these things it's the one which shines I don't think we need to do anything to be successful you're already born successful I feel I think it's the baggage that we carry that stops us from learning and growing yeah

[00:22:43] because it puts you in that mindset of oh I'm not ready yet like I was working with a student yesterday in one of my workshops and she's like I have done this great work and you know people are getting great result but I'm still why don't I am procrastinating I just don't get time only to do it

[00:23:00] and my answer to that was you know you will you're looking to start at 100 but you're never going to start at 100 all the people those who become successful started zero or sometimes minus right and she's like yeah but I don't know why do I keep waiting for that 100

[00:23:18] you keep waiting for that 100 because somewhere deep down there's a trauma that you're still not dealt with because as a child where you've ever seen a child lying down on the bed feeling anxious no two months baby three months baby no have you ever seen her through two three months baby fearing her look how searching if I cry and ask for milk no right we all have scream shouted we all have asked for whatever wanted when we are younger that is you rest everything is going to be okay

[00:23:48] everything is I think and that is the I think that when you go back and you fix that things start dramatically shifting in your life

[00:23:58] they're two aspects to fixing that especially when it comes to relationships right for a lot of us I think a lot of the trauma or the baggage we carry I love the word cobwebs that you said the cobwebs you've not dusted off

[00:24:13] all comes from different relationships and things that have happened with other people in our life as you growing up I believe and I think people might disagree is that it's sometimes easier to deal with the issues inside you then it is to deal with other people

[00:24:27] you don't want to go to your parent or your spouse or your partner or someone who's your friends in childhood and say this is what you did to me and this is why I've been going through this my entire life

[00:24:40] feels like a statement I can't do that to the person you know it might just break the relationship you know we have all those questions there

[00:24:48] but it's a fundamental part of what we have to do so one is how do we correct ourselves is one aspect but how do we correct while we know that the way to correct it is actually addressed to other people

[00:25:01] you know I always talk about this where and that most people say that I don't have the right environment at home

[00:25:08] I think expecting people to understand us itself is a wrong statement or wrong expectation because as you said rightly the first thing is you have to understand yourself first how many of us understand ourselves fully

[00:25:23] that's true

[00:25:25] and then expecting others to understand us is beyond because they also are struggling in their life understanding you is nobody else's responsibility

[00:25:34] it is your soul responsibility after you become 18

[00:25:38] before that maybe you are dependent on other people so your job is to work on yourself and there are valid you know evidences we have from people's researches that they have done

[00:25:49] like there's one typical research that I talk about is Maharshi Mahesh Yogi who's a originator of transcendental meditation

[00:25:56] and his entire research was on this that he took 7000 Yogi's and he trained them into great levels of meditations

[00:26:06] and in various cities of US where there was a higher crime rate and things like that he just placed these 7000 people in various cities

[00:26:16] and they did an experiment Yogi's did not go and tell anything to anybody they were just doing their job the way they do that could be kindness that could be smiling with somebody

[00:26:26] a strong stranger doing their things you know working on their vibrations elevating their vibrations what they observed after a while is in those cities the crime rate was reduced 20 to 25% on its own

[00:26:39] so if you take that example the moment you start working on yourself and you continue to work on yourself it's not going to happen overnight

[00:26:49] so you continue to work on yourself and you start producing different results in your life there will be people in your life who will watch it and say hey you know what I want to become like Varun

[00:26:59] I want to become like make now what did she do what did he do to change that for themselves and we can become the torchbearers in our families

[00:27:09] I don't think we can I mean I don't know how it is I have tried explaining to people multiple times initially that this is really great this works this works

[00:27:19] nobody would listen to me and say that you are working on us

[00:27:23] don't push it on me yeah right and I have what people saying this you know maybe you need it I don't need it

[00:27:29] because when it comes to mental health people think that you know I don't need it I don't have a problem because that's what we are grown up with the education system

[00:27:38] the cultural biases anything that comes with mental health we feel it's a tab is still I feel

[00:27:44] right so you know I think that I don't I don't think that it working with anybody or telling them to work works the only thing that can be done is if you have a great relationship

[00:27:55] if you're doing something maybe you can involve them in what you're doing and accepting that they may take their own journey not pushing on them

[00:28:07] and expecting them to understand you is beyond because see you have a vision of growing and becoming this person they don't

[00:28:17] so how do you expect them to even understand that vision right and plus they have so many fears just like we had when we were younger our community is that

[00:28:28] when they have the fears and the biggest fear I feel is the families have is if she changes or if he changes and if they grow or if we lose them

[00:28:38] and the second biggest fear they have is if they are changing I will have to change too and let's be honest we are human beings we hate change

[00:28:47] the only human being who likes change is the baby in the wet diaper right 100%

[00:28:54] if change is such a tricky thing because to go if you're not changing no matter how bad your situation is you feel like you're comfortable

[00:29:05] at least that whole frying pan and fire scenario right we are listening okay one second you hear it's bad but what if it gets worse let me just stay here

[00:29:13] and but we have to almost cross beyond that fear of okay what change might bring and then at some point you start to learn and then you start to grow

[00:29:21] right but I think for most of us because our reflexes and let me just be here let me just stick to that fear

[00:29:28] we don't even try to figure out which is I mean the classical see things under the carpet don't deal with it you're fine

[00:29:36] all simple factors you know you don't you don't have to turn and respond to someone and tell them how you're feeling or what you what their actions have made you kind of feel like

[00:29:46] I feel all of even like you said transcendental meditation I feel even meditation to itself is something people fear because how can I sit down and do nothing

[00:29:57] it is the scariest thing for most people to sit by themselves and do nothing because that has to be one of the toughest things especially today's world

[00:30:07] where you have so many ting ting ting ting ting all around us that how do you sit and really have that conundition with yourself

[00:30:15] I'd love for you to talk about the power of things like transcendental meditation and what that really does for you to unlock what's in your head

[00:30:23] so honestly to be really really brutally honest with you are in and people who are watching us here I was one of them

[00:30:33] who could never meditate and the reason I could never meditate is because I had so many thoughts from the past the negative experiences that I had had

[00:30:44] that it was very difficult for me to sit by myself not even meditating just by but just being alone with myself

[00:30:53] I could never be I had to engage myself into something be with someone or do something but I could just never sit still

[00:31:02] so I can totally relate to this whole thing you know that why you can't do it

[00:31:08] the simple thing is you know you can't just do meditation like that otherwise it's a harcoic or right

[00:31:13] meditation is not that meditation is something that is comes much later before that happens is a reflection

[00:31:21] so what is the simplest technique that you can use is you have to train your brain every single day

[00:31:28] when you are going going to sleep in the night you just take five minutes and you don't have to do anything

[00:31:35] just starting of the day when you woke up till the time that you came on the bed

[00:31:40] just focus on all the hours like suppose you woke up at six o'clock six to seven what you did seven to eight eight to nine

[00:31:47] ta-da-da-da-da you go till whatever time you are sleeping every hour what was the highlight of the hour

[00:31:53] okay that's called as reflection when you train your brain to reflect what happens in the reflection is

[00:31:59] when you focus on that hour you realize that what are some things that you did great

[00:32:05] what are some things that you could have done better what are some things you should not have done

[00:32:09] so it's becoming aware of what are your thoughts and this is a good practice to do for very long time

[00:32:16] before even getting into meditation because I personally don't recommend meditation to people

[00:32:21] those who are anxious or depressed because when you meditate what happens it opens the gate

[00:32:27] of the subconscious mind and if you go into meditation with anxiety it might take the anxiety deeper

[00:32:34] and then everything else will like it's like you know you you meditation is like people some people use it as a drug

[00:32:40] like I'm sitting and I'm feeling good for this 30 minutes and you felt better but now you've taken all the shit inside your subconscious

[00:32:46] and suddenly after the 30 minutes get over it's like you know drug effect is over now it's all like boom back

[00:32:51] so rather do reflection it'll help you big time to deal with your emotions which are uncomfortable emotions

[00:32:59] that you have gone through to the day and you will realize over the period of time like if you do the activity

[00:33:04] of reflection for say 90 days you will realize that there's such a dramatic difference in your way of thinking

[00:33:12] because as I said earlier we are all geniuses and nobody wants to be depressed nobody wants to be anxious

[00:33:18] nobody wants to be fearful or nobody wants to fall sick it's what is happening in your subconscious mind

[00:33:24] so the reflection gives you an ability to pivot in your thought process so don't be alone till you can't

[00:33:33] don't meditate till you can't and you know this beautiful thing about meditation is what is meditation

[00:33:38] it's not just sitting in silence meditation could be when an artist is painting

[00:33:43] meditation could be when a sportsman is playing meditation could be a author is writing

[00:33:50] those are all forms of meditation meditation could be someone who's singing

[00:33:55] meditation could be someone who's dancing and you don't have to be a maestro to do that

[00:33:59] I think if you have a lot of things going on in your space I ask people to not get into meditation

[00:34:05] sitting rather do the meditation in the walk on the beach or go to the forest

[00:34:13] or just kind of like you know be one with the nature because you're part of nature

[00:34:19] right second thing you can do is you can simply dance or sing whatever you like

[00:34:23] swimming could be a great meditation right so I think we should start with the active forms of meditation

[00:34:30] if you can't do sit down meditations once you master the active forms of meditation

[00:34:36] eventually you can start and don't start 30 minutes that two minutes that's okay

[00:34:42] and in those two minutes also know that you're going to get flood of thoughts

[00:34:46] just remember to not engage with those thoughts

[00:34:51] just just that's enough like how do you disassociate from how do you observe that thought

[00:34:56] okay I came the thought of I'm not good enough okay the thought has come and it's like

[00:35:00] it's like a like a train passing the station right you don't have to stop at all stations

[00:35:06] so that's the training and eventually you can become a good meditator but it's a practice

[00:35:12] I'm glad you said reflection before meditation

[00:35:16] because A I think meditation comes with a lot of pressure it comes with the feeling

[00:35:20] oh I remember the first time I couldn't do think a minute is what I did

[00:35:26] and then the second time I did maybe a couple of minutes it's taken me years to come to

[00:35:30] like my present I would say record of for 15 minutes that's the max I can go I can't go more than that

[00:35:36] but even then I prefer the ones which have prompts you know someone's telling me what to do

[00:35:40] what to do with my breath what else to do reflection something I unfortunately came too much later

[00:35:44] because I realized that there was a power to journaling and I took the pressure off saying

[00:35:48] I don't have a right every day I read the day I want to write but the one thing I haven't gotten myself to do

[00:35:54] which which a lot of people use as a very powerful tool is to understand how to visualize and how to manifest

[00:36:00] two things that I've heard so many words and I mean I'm married to someone who believes in manifestation

[00:36:08] but I haven't been able to get my man around it I'm like no it doesn't it doesn't work for me yet I don't understand it yet

[00:36:16] for a still an on-be-liver like me is does it actually work manifestation visualization

[00:36:24] well if you think of let's take and let's do an activity right now okay so I want you to think of an apple

[00:36:32] so what did you just see as an apple?

[00:36:36] I saw I didn't see a Washington apple I saw the regular in DC apple for some reason

[00:36:42] but you saw an apple did you see a spelling of apple or did you see a apple apple?

[00:36:48] I saw an apple apple. Apple apple right so why did you see apple you feel

[00:36:54] because my mind has an imagery of it already imprinted?

[00:36:58] It's not imagery of it already printed yes it is in case of apple but your brain does not read words

[00:37:06] it reads images of the words so even if you say I saw a ppl e you saw an image of an apple

[00:37:14] yeah word right so it's not we our words are the secondary part of your brain learning the first part of your brain

[00:37:22] learning is images and that's why we do a lot of activities with children in terms of pictorial activities

[00:37:28] right because that's where they're picking up all the information so our fundamental foundational

[00:37:34] learning skill of brain is visual and that's where if you can learn your studies visually why can't

[00:37:43] you learn what we want in future visually? That answers your question how does visualization work

[00:37:50] because your brain a part of your brain I would say does not differentiate and this is the old

[00:37:57] day's part of your brain which has got something called as reticular activation system

[00:38:02] and this is a bundle of knobs so reticular activation system basically is your navigation system

[00:38:08] like Google Maps right so the navigation system in the in the flood of information

[00:38:16] all the information that comes to us you know our subconscious processes more than 40,000

[00:38:21] bits of data every single moment our conscious only processes 40 bits of data so that's the

[00:38:28] difference now your subconscious is overloaded with that information by the end of the day or

[00:38:33] you know even even half an hour when you go on social media right yeah so what happens is

[00:38:38] the reticular activation system basically filters that information because your brain may be a

[00:38:43] supercomputer but it will still crash if it has to process all the information so what it does is

[00:38:49] it filters out the information that is relevant to you so say you just bought a car or you bought

[00:38:56] an outfit a particular accessory or something which is now you when you decide to buy it or you

[00:39:02] do research on it or you actually buy it do you see it more around you yeah right so does that

[00:39:09] mean that everybody bought with you no it was already there but now your reticular activation system

[00:39:15] has understood that this is relevant for Varun he's bought it he's invested his time money energy

[00:39:22] into this product or whatever it is so I want to see this more I want to show him more because

[00:39:28] this seems like something important information so reticular activation system based on what you

[00:39:34] invest your time energy money in or emotions in and there's a reason your reticular activation

[00:39:39] system works on what beliefs you already carry and that's where I was talking about the changing

[00:39:44] of the beliefs that coming from the past is fundamental repairing your past yeah the second

[00:39:49] thing about the visualization of this reticular activation system if you continue to give it

[00:39:54] that information it will start feeling that there's a reason you're engaging with this information

[00:39:59] it's like you're going on research about a particular car so it's sending you all the messages

[00:40:05] about the car right so visualization works exactly like that so this part of your brain does not

[00:40:11] understand the difference between what is real and what is imaginary so when you do the visualization

[00:40:18] for the future that you want now it could be a particular body shape it could be a vacation it

[00:40:25] could be a particular business a particular turnover whatever it is means for you car whatever

[00:40:30] whatever right people do visualization for various things now when you do that when you do it

[00:40:35] again and again and again your reticular activation system feels that this is important information

[00:40:42] and let me show or run more opportunities that it can become his reality because in the reticular

[00:40:49] activation system this is a reality and that's how the visualization works now let's keep visualization

[00:40:57] manifestation separate yeah because manifestation is a whole different topic yeah most people think

[00:41:03] you're manifesting when you're visualizing that's further is from the truth you're manifesting 24

[00:41:09] hours the life that you're living right now is a manifestation of your thoughts okay it's not that

[00:41:15] half an hour you may not be focusing actively on visualizations but there is a different process

[00:41:21] where I'm in your brain to be this successful that it is visualizing in a certain different way

[00:41:27] that's where the most of the places you will see when when the cooperates are building or when

[00:41:31] you're building your start up you're doing you're engaging a lot in creative visualization what are

[00:41:35] you doing in creative visualization you're manifesting because that's where I think you have to live

[00:41:43] breath smell the future that you want to live and that people are not able to do why do people

[00:41:50] fall into the same realities again and again is because you're not changing your thoughts it is

[00:41:56] because what you thought today you must have thought yesterday day before a week back a month back

[00:42:00] a year back or maybe yours the decisions that you're making today is creating your destiny but if

[00:42:06] what if you're we are on an average a human being takes about 35,000 decisions every single day

[00:42:13] and I haven't seen a person however much ever the person is successful has taken given me more than

[00:42:17] three to five conscious decisions that they have taken on the particular day so then who's taking

[00:42:23] the 34,995 decisions for you it is your reptilian part of your brain which wants to keep you safe

[00:42:30] and comfortable so when you manifesting the same old stuff in your life remember that there's

[00:42:38] a lot of garbage there that needs to be cleaned you know while you were talking I was also thinking

[00:42:43] is that the fundamental mistake a lot of people might be making is that the belief manifestation

[00:42:49] is saying I will have a dream the dream will come true and I don't have to do anything about it

[00:42:54] but maybe we have to understand that dreams and manifesting has one fundamental difference that

[00:43:00] the actual effort you have to put in right I'd love you to dig into that part

[00:43:03] so see what does manifestation say you have to first conceive that's where the creative

[00:43:09] visualization comes whether you're doing it on the paper or in your mind doesn't matter

[00:43:13] I am a personal fan of doing it on the paper yeah I also don't do it on my head because I feel

[00:43:18] that there's so much there it might get lost so I have lots of books journals and I have separate

[00:43:24] journals for everything and I keep doing the lot of work on my journal so conceive then you believe

[00:43:31] so how does a belief come believe just doesn't come because oh today I want to become a 100

[00:43:35] crore person in your bank if there's one lack you can't just become a hundred crore person from

[00:43:40] one lack right so to believe that you have what are the resources you require at that point of time

[00:43:47] okay you may not be a hundred crore person right now but from one lack to a hundred crore is a

[00:43:53] journey so can you learn to become that person absolutely yes how do you become that person

[00:44:00] so your personality right what does your personality constitute the way you think the way you feel

[00:44:06] and the way you act so the act part is very much required there right so the belief has pretty

[00:44:12] much everything the conviction doesn't come from thinking the conviction comes from taking action

[00:44:17] right so that's huge part of I think belief which people miss out it I mean a lot of times I

[00:44:23] feel that people just start doing affirmations or sit down in meditations yes it will work it

[00:44:28] probably will make you a person who probably will start taking different actions but then there is

[00:44:32] a there's a power to being conscious about your actions right that's very very important it's

[00:44:39] like to give an example let's take a garden you have lots of seeds okay now you have seeds in your

[00:44:45] hand and your weight you're you're having seeds and there is a plot there and you're thinking okay my

[00:44:50] seeds are going to turn into beautiful garden my seeds are going to turn into beautiful garden it's

[00:44:54] never going to turn into your garden unless you plan them you you actually nurture them you put some

[00:45:00] water you kind of remove the weeds from it because you want to be very watchful 10 the garden

[00:45:05] properly that's where over a period of time that garden will become a garden not overnight as well

[00:45:12] like I see a lot of reels and videos etc floating across social media saying I manifested this much

[00:45:18] money overnight maybe it was already then your parents bank so it's not it doesn't work that way

[00:45:27] because and also see I personally feel that you may get something that you want a lot of people

[00:45:35] I know after reading secret have come up and said that they got what they wanted but they could

[00:45:41] not sustain it you can't because your vibrations in that moment probably were matching that goal

[00:45:49] but because you have not done the deep work on yourself your vibrations dropped and the moment

[00:45:54] your vibrations dropped it's like it's like our time but you remember the television used to come

[00:46:00] with it and then on the terrace yeah at someone's going on top and you move and you're shouting and

[00:46:04] saying with this phone that it's right and then you're hitting the TV you're hitting Nantila

[00:46:10] so it's the same thing like what is what are you actually catching is you're aligning the vibration

[00:46:15] the television is just projecting the picture of the vibration that it is frequency that it is

[00:46:21] catching so whatever you are achieving in your life is just the picture of the frequency you're

[00:46:27] catching in the universe and that will not last if you don't work on it consistently

[00:46:33] I want to ask you about two words of used vibration and frequency how do we

[00:46:42] how do let's open this up when I say this is the vibration I'm feeling some use the word energy

[00:46:49] which I'm feeling from other people some will say vibration I've heard many of these terms right but

[00:46:54] for someone again I'm going very like okay I'm a non-believer what is this vibration I don't know

[00:47:00] what it is how can it how can they be vibration in there what would you say to explain what

[00:47:08] this vibration actually is and how do I spot it okay do you believe in electricity yes so if

[00:47:14] there is no light will you still believe in electricity if the bulbs are not on maybe not

[00:47:21] okay it's okay it's okay you may not maybe you're just being a hard customer right now for me

[00:47:29] so it's okay if you don't believe that's what people say that's that's right so what I would suggest

[00:47:33] is pick up a socket put your finger in it and switch on the switch on the switch then I definitely

[00:47:38] will believe you believe in it right why would you believe in something that is can you see electricity

[00:47:44] you can't right can you see air you can't you can only see air because the dust particles

[00:47:51] but close your mouth close your nose because of time you're going to feel lack of it and then

[00:47:56] you're suddenly going to believe oh there is yeah Bhagwan hey yeah yeah it's a vibration

[00:48:00] select that everything on this planet whether it is not planet entire universe whether it is

[00:48:08] living a non-living has a vibration it's emitting a certain electromagnetic frequency

[00:48:14] and you can measure it with the resonance instruments we have done this experiment as a child

[00:48:18] you remember in school physics me the resonance yeah same thing you can actually practically check

[00:48:24] the resonance for everything everything like this mic you me camera everything has a resonance

[00:48:32] and that resonance your frequency is a measurement of vibration and there are so many different

[00:48:38] vibrations that we as human beings carry we are capable of carrying Radhra I would say because

[00:48:43] we are fortunate that we can carry so many vibrations in us so if you don't believe in it there are

[00:48:51] so many ways that you can believe in is one of them is put the finger in the socket yeah which is

[00:48:56] also and the reason I I asked you that is because it's it's sometimes easier to say but for someone

[00:49:02] to believe they need to experience it yeah so you know vibration is nothing else but it's electric

[00:49:08] electricity right so all of us once in our life at least I've got the static right so have you

[00:49:14] studied in school where it says that you have to be a conductor of electricity to experience electricity

[00:49:19] yeah so how can you experience static if you don't have electricity yourself so then would you say

[00:49:26] that for a person to let's say I want to work towards a certain kind of life right and I have to deal

[00:49:34] with all the things that are bad vibrations from my past things which are holding me back almost

[00:49:39] blocking me so even when I would be visualizing I'm suddenly seeing some gray areas which are blocking

[00:49:44] my eyes because it's stopping me from seeing what I could be so I got to first get all of that stuff

[00:49:51] out and then I'm visualizing where I can go and then I'm manifesting what that could be

[00:49:57] but throughout that it's almost like sometimes you know it might just be your gut and your gut is

[00:50:01] actually the vibration you listen to it's saying oh one thing this is what I should do and it's

[00:50:05] giving me clarity towards the decision would you say that's a good way to explain it

[00:50:12] well you know what I would say that don't believe too much on your gut feeling if you have a lot

[00:50:19] of stuff happened in your past because now the voice is all muddled you don't know that so the

[00:50:24] first thing that you need to do is pause and actually start writing down what comes to you

[00:50:31] clarity has a biggest power right why people are anxious why people are stressed why people are

[00:50:38] confused or have doubts is because they don't have clarity yeah the moment you get the clarity

[00:50:44] nothing of this will come to you it's a lack of clarity that builds trust in you

[00:50:50] so don't listen to it right now just put everything down on the people

[00:50:56] and then see what makes sense out of it most of the times if you have a lot of things happened

[00:51:03] in your past coming from a lot of traumatic experiences a lot of your first page would be probably

[00:51:09] all negatives once you've removed all that then you then the real stuff starts coming out and

[00:51:15] you start putting it out there as well and when that happens you know then you there are some

[00:51:20] nuggets will come out and then actually consciously make a squat swat analysis once you do the

[00:51:28] swat analysis that's where you'll be able to match with the alignment of the voice that you're

[00:51:32] actually listening to and that's see there are two things you need to understand if your gut feeling

[00:51:38] says that you don't do something and that feeling comes with fear it's not your gut feeling it's

[00:51:46] not your intuition and that fear that gut feeling will always make you not take action yeah but if

[00:51:53] your gut feeling says that don't do it but do it this way so you the the the feeling that you need

[00:52:01] to listen to is the one that makes you take action but the feeling that comes to you that tells you

[00:52:07] don't take action is a fear not feeling that's a clear distinction between the voice that you have

[00:52:14] within yourself so once you've done this swat analysis then you answer the three questions

[00:52:20] to get to where you want to be from where you are the first is what do I need to stop doing at

[00:52:24] this part of time because it's not doing much it's eliminating more that helps you to reach your

[00:52:31] goal faster the second question is what do I need to start doing new because something you're not

[00:52:38] doing that's why you're not getting there so what is it that you need to start doing that could

[00:52:42] be learning from somebody who's already achieved that goal or maybe finding the resources to

[00:52:49] delegate some work so that you can create an extra time to finish that writing that book or that

[00:52:53] report and the third thing that you must understand is what do I need to continue doing because see

[00:52:59] we are all not broken there's a part of us that has done something's really right and that's why

[00:53:05] we are alive and we are here so what are those beautiful things that you already have with the new

[00:53:09] that you want to continue doing so these are the three questions that you must answer after your swat

[00:53:16] to get to this strength weakness opportunity threat into this metrics

[00:53:22] what do I need to stop doing what do I need to start doing and what do I need to continue doing

[00:53:27] I'm 100% sure the clarity will emerge so well and you will see that the clarity is power

[00:53:35] it will not stop you so don't believe a lot on your thoughts honestly because you get 60,000

[00:53:41] 70,000 thoughts every day right so your thoughts are not true but your feelings are facts

[00:53:48] so focus on what you're feeling and that will guide that could be a north star

[00:53:54] and you know we were just having this conversation about your wife choosing and feeling and I think

[00:53:59] that's the best way because I always choose my feelings for my year so say 2024

[00:54:09] I'm choosing my feelings out of the top three feelings that I want to feel for 2024 and my design

[00:54:15] my entire planning and vision goes around feeling those feelings so anything that does not align

[00:54:23] with that feeling I don't do it it's the easiest way because that's your north star

[00:54:28] it's um I think I read about this as well that is it's feeling based goals versus quantifiable

[00:54:36] goals and that way you look at a broader spectrum of what you could do it doesn't feel restrictive

[00:54:41] in that sense and also while you're talking it reminded me of like so I've been on a bit of a

[00:54:46] journey for the last five years I would say from 2018-2019 or maybe 2020 onwards now I think a lot

[00:54:53] of us went through um you know that's that shock we needed to get 2020 was the year for a lot of

[00:54:58] first thing you know put that finger into the socket and suddenly got that shock in life in one

[00:55:01] second let's think about life but what that led me down was to really take away all the junk when

[00:55:07] you said eliminate thing that's so important because there's so many things we overload ourselves with

[00:55:13] which are restricting us and only you can't do this you shouldn't do this um or the fact that okay

[00:55:18] now the only doing this is come to pull stick to that and I had put myself in the spot where I

[00:55:24] had agreed to all those things were restricting me and it's been a slow process of peeling off

[00:55:29] restriction after restriction I would say for the last almost three four years and I still feel

[00:55:35] I've only hit like stage one or stage two of the stuff to take off there is always that voicing

[00:55:40] no relation to this it won't work it hasn't worked in the past and I just have to and I'm glad

[00:55:47] you said write it on paper because the more we write things down on paper it's like a conundition

[00:55:52] with yourself but it's not random it's not how I mean it's actually on paper um and once on

[00:55:58] paper there is something to and and this is not like an iPad on papers scenario I know a lot of

[00:56:03] people ask me this question can I do it digitally oh it don't pencil or pen on an actual piece of

[00:56:09] paper there is and I was trying to find some research on it I think there is some which says

[00:56:13] the tactileness of just that feeling of you you're touching that and you're feeling that

[00:56:18] that texture there is something that does to your mind which makes you say this is you putting it

[00:56:23] on paper um which means that this is you having a conundition with yourself and then you kind of

[00:56:28] cross things off yeah and just the the practice of crossing something off just has this impact on

[00:56:34] your mind it's like it's done it's it's gone um versus you thinking in your head and then

[00:56:39] thinking can go on forever and you never know what is got what is chatter or what is negative

[00:56:44] thoughts what is positive thoughts and maybe put your paper also helps you deal with something which

[00:56:50] most of us run away from is we run away from pain um we don't want to deal with pain but

[00:56:58] we need pain throughout our lives because otherwise you're not feeling pain they're not feeling

[00:57:02] you're dead right but how does someone start a journey of dealing with pain because it's such a tough

[00:57:08] one we don't like like don't touch anything hard don't deal with pain but

[00:57:15] it's you have to cross that bridge to progress yeah you know interestingly you said about pain

[00:57:22] I feel the abbreviation of pain is pay attention to the information in now

[00:57:27] right P is for pay yes for attention

[00:57:32] eyes for information and in stands for now yeah so whichever pain is coming to you whether

[00:57:37] it's a physical or an emotional pain has an information embedded in it because every pain has

[00:57:43] a frequency and every frequency has an information right just like Wi-Fi or first telegram or

[00:57:49] more score everything has a you know information decoding right so every pain that comes to you

[00:57:56] has an information so rather than feeling that I want to avoid the pain how about asking

[00:58:03] it a question what are you here to tell me because your triggers your pain is your teacher

[00:58:11] so you're going to ask the right questions what do you want from me what are you here to teach me

[00:58:17] what are you here to show me because I have seen were honestly I've seen 30 40 years of pain in one

[00:58:24] of my workshops that I do regularly 30 40 years of pain just vaporizes in 10 minutes of a process

[00:58:31] and it never comes back because that pain was carrying a certain information either a future or

[00:58:38] a past and interestingly every emotion if you look at east and for energy in motion so every

[00:58:46] emotion has a frequency right and because we are like we are all mean almost 120 chemicals in our

[00:58:53] body every single day okay and this is normal not stressed a normal human being generates 120 chemicals

[00:59:02] so imagine all the 120 chemicals are like a factory of you know chemical factory having that

[00:59:09] information and based on suppose you keep ignoring certain things in your life the more and more

[00:59:16] will come pain will come in your life whether it's an emotional or a physical pain just to take

[00:59:22] you back to that place for you to address it yeah and tell me something here Varun let's agree

[00:59:30] this or let me know if you disagree but do you think you as a parent will you ever give something

[00:59:36] to your child that your child will not be able to handle not beyond a certain limit correct

[00:59:45] you'll only go like if if your child can handle probably this cup you'll probably make it a

[00:59:50] little bigger so that she can increase her strength them into a swimming pool right you know that

[00:59:54] okay once again it's safe enough they won't like you know we have an adverse effect so you will

[00:59:59] increase the load on your child based on you know assessing their capacity right so let's think

[01:00:07] of the universe as one big organization and you and I as one single cell in that organization

[01:00:14] yeah organism let's take not organization otherwise some people say oh but my organization

[01:00:18] gives me a lot of work which I can't handle so let's go back to organize organism correct

[01:00:22] so let's take this whole universe as a human body and you or me are probably one single cell

[01:00:28] by the way anything that happens in your body full body whatever the systems are operating every

[01:00:35] single cell of your body operates the same system okay so there's a constant messaging going on

[01:00:40] from your body to your that oneself and from cell to your body just like a parent and child

[01:00:46] relationship right yeah so parent is only going to give a child as much workload that the child can

[01:00:51] handle because a parent loves the child yeah this is a context your body loves you yeah right so it

[01:00:58] is going to give you only that much pain that you can handle but if you keep rebelling and saying

[01:01:05] what I want and I'm not going to deal with it then it is going to increase the intensity of the

[01:01:11] pain just to point it out to you you better deal with it otherwise I'm not going to stop

[01:01:18] so whether it's an emotional or a physical pain it has an information for you to decode

[01:01:25] and once you decode that information it would be the greatest opportunity of your life

[01:01:30] so if you have pain celebrate because you have given you've been given a greatest opportunity in your

[01:01:36] life to change your life it's giving your signal to say that you need to kind of let it out you need

[01:01:42] to let it out or maybe there is an information there maybe this saying something like

[01:01:47] you need to take action on something like I'll typically give you an scenario like generally

[01:01:51] a lower back pain for a lot of people that comes if you like in my last 26 years I have understood

[01:01:59] that most people those who get lower back pain especially the belt area you know the

[01:02:03] lumber and uh costumous area that pain has come to those people because of a traumatic even based on

[01:02:12] a financial problem or a financial challenge or every time they felt that they are walking on

[01:02:18] the tightrope now that could be not just financial that could be emotional tightrope like suppose some

[01:02:24] people are dealing with probably an narcissistic family member and that itself is like you're walking

[01:02:29] on the actual constantly so it's a tightrope situation and in that situations the pain has created

[01:02:38] message for them that they have to start working on the root of that pain if it is a lot of people

[01:02:45] use physical pain as a reminder by the way for not going back to that past event yeah it is

[01:02:52] I can't even begin to tell you it's so amazing to see them that when you take them back to that event

[01:02:58] they're not even aware of obviously because nobody teaches you this and when they release themselves

[01:03:03] from that trauma pain is gone and I like I've never felt this we ever in my life it's the same

[01:03:10] thing with your emotional pain so every time the pain comes don't run away dance and celebrate as

[01:03:16] it's an opportunity for you to grow in your life that's a perspective shift that you have to

[01:03:22] bring in yourself it's not an obstacle it's an opportunity you know I feel that what I

[01:03:29] think what I've learned also from this from you is that when you're looking at pain while

[01:03:36] it's signaling to you that it's something that you need to deal with because telling you something

[01:03:40] you also need to ask yourself can I what do I need you to overcome it yeah like I love studying

[01:03:49] athletes and just how their mindset works right this is entire and sometimes you have to believe

[01:03:53] that something can happen and one of my favorite stories was there was the if I remember it's a four-minute

[01:03:59] mile yeah Roger Ballister it's like everybody said it's impossible you can't run a four-minute

[01:04:03] mile and they kept seeing it for years and years and years and the first person did the four-minute

[01:04:08] the second person happened quickly and after that everybody started doing it right it's like

[01:04:12] you had to have one person push beyond that that pain it suddenly became less pain for everybody else

[01:04:18] it was someone's done it so I should be able to do it um and like one of my favorite authors

[01:04:24] and podcasts is someone called Rich Roll right um Rich Old Ventura Lord trauma growing up

[01:04:29] and you know became an alcoholic can have to go through um you know rehab for that then

[01:04:35] replaced alcohol with food didn't over get over the trauma he just replaced it one mechanism with

[01:04:40] the other and then eventually at the age of 40 almost felt like getting a heart attack when he's

[01:04:45] walking up a flight of stairs and a couple of years later he runs five-alternum arathons back to

[01:04:51] back right he it's sometimes you have to choose pain beyond what you're going through because he said

[01:04:56] he had to prove to himself that he could do this and every time he pushed himself towards that

[01:05:01] boundary and pushed that boundary a little bit more you realize that there's so much more you can do

[01:05:06] and it's something like for me that's been the learnings that you don't have to push against what

[01:05:11] your what your barrier is but if you're in general pushing barriers it comes easier for you to move

[01:05:18] beyond them absolutely I totally agree with you do you also kind of when you look at how someone figures

[01:05:24] themselves out and you spoken about writing something down a bunch of times we've also spoken about

[01:05:31] dealing with so much that is there if I have to look at the human mind today and I want to

[01:05:36] circle back to how you've been started getting into this and we look at you know we talk about

[01:05:42] Ayurvedic medicine today you know we all understood the value of that the world is we got the value

[01:05:46] of Ayurveda and where that comes in and how what how that can connect to how we look at our mind

[01:05:52] do feel everything's getting connected now finally we're not putting it head in my mind and

[01:05:56] bodies separately that we're connecting together and some form nature and natural

[01:06:00] beats are actually helping bind that I think it's still very on the surface especially in India I

[01:06:06] feel you know first full of fordability yeah a second the mindset of feeling that this is luxury

[01:06:12] this is not necessity we're dealing with a lot of stuff on the ground levels of survival food

[01:06:19] shelter clothes where this becomes but I think at the global level yes it's much better also I

[01:06:25] feel celebrities coming and saying has made a lot of difference like you know oh then you

[01:06:30] know you realize oh if this can happen to them yeah after having so many things then I need to

[01:06:36] you know so I think there is a lot of awakening happening happening because the growth that I see

[01:06:42] that people reaching out to us is exponential and and these are some amazing people you know

[01:06:48] you just feel that wow I mean somebody the other day I was uh working to and you know she

[01:06:54] was saying that you must be having more women coming to you for this and I said no

[01:07:00] I have you know that was the scenario before but what I have today is seventy percent men

[01:07:06] and that's such a heartwarming you know experience for me as a woman because I feel that these are

[01:07:13] the people those who are going to make that world better place because I think it's not just one

[01:07:18] person so one gender's duty I think it's I think whoever awakens at whatever time

[01:07:24] and whatever ways that you can get access to something invest and do it because it's the biggest

[01:07:30] investment that you will experience but we have a long way to go honestly I feel I think with

[01:07:35] podcasts like this or you know other people working things like that I think slowly it will

[01:07:40] learning yeah it will work slowly we still I think are 10 15 years behind

[01:07:47] no I asked that also because I feel that at least A.V. you're not saying we don't want to talk

[01:07:51] about it it's not a thing now we all agree that there is something there and I feel we are all

[01:07:56] starting our journey towards okay what is the next step I need to take how do I start progressing

[01:08:00] towards it if you had a piece of advice for someone who was starting that off today um in terms

[01:08:08] of their journey um what is step one okay you know I'm going to use uh quotations from Buddha okay

[01:08:19] so Buddha has already told us two and a half years to two and a half thousand years back

[01:08:25] to master something what do you need to do the first one is Buddha Msharadam Ghatchami right surrender

[01:08:30] to the Enlightened one surrender to a Guru a teacher that not necessarily a spiritual Guru right

[01:08:36] the context here is what do you where you are and where you want to go has somebody already got

[01:08:42] so I don't think in in the world with the goals that we have everybody has a all the goals are

[01:08:48] been achieved right beyond like you if you say I want to go to mass that's a different story but

[01:08:53] otherwise the regular people have the goals those when somebody has achieved right so rather than

[01:08:59] reinventing the wheel rather than trying to figure it out yourself find that person and we are

[01:09:04] living in an information world today where people are really ready to give information okay the one

[01:09:10] expectation that people have is it should come for free so don't do that yeah nothing comes for free

[01:09:17] and if you're getting something free that means you are the product so invest your time invest your

[01:09:23] money that's the second line that Buddha sees you know first is Buddha Msharadam Ghatchami then there

[01:09:29] is Dhammam Sharanam Ghatchami Dhammam is not Dharma if you look at Dharma is Dharma of nature okay so

[01:09:38] what's the rule of cosmos you first sow the seed and then you reap the fruits right so when

[01:09:45] you surrender to that teacher whoever it is what are the seeds that that that person is asking you

[01:09:50] to sow whether you need to give your time whether you need to give your efforts whether you need to

[01:09:54] give your money what do you need to give give that first and then expect the return of value

[01:10:01] so don't expect anything coming to you for free that's the I think that's the biggest thing that

[01:10:07] people have to understand that mental health and people those are giving the services they have

[01:10:14] done a lot of hard work and it just can't be given to you free because whatever we get for free we

[01:10:20] don't value right so invest whatever they're asking you to invest and the third is Sangam Sharanam

[01:10:28] Ghatchami because you are going to be the byproduct of the five people that you're with so Sangam is

[01:10:35] a community so what community you want to belong to from here on and would you need to become

[01:10:42] or what do you need to be to be part of that community I think these are the three simple steps

[01:10:49] that a man walked on this planet mastered himself enlightened and then spread the entire

[01:10:56] religion and a philosophy has given us and I think if we understand the true meaning of it not

[01:11:03] from the religious point of view but from a philosophical point of view to master anything in your

[01:11:09] life you've done it like if you were a when you were a baby you learned to walk and your teacher

[01:11:16] was probably your mother or father your grandparents what you gave at that time is your efforts to not

[01:11:23] stopping even if you fell down you dusted and you walked and then the third thing happened is

[01:11:32] that community everybody was walking so you learned to walk so things that as simple as walking

[01:11:39] talking eating we have not learned without a teacher why do you all figure out life without a

[01:11:44] teacher I just don't get this I mean the shortest possible way your education doesn't stop at

[01:11:52] your college your education should begin after your college you know what you just said about

[01:12:00] being open to learning for life I feel the co-part there is also the

[01:12:04] you might see if I'm going to start this journey I need to do this but today say I want to do it and

[01:12:10] want to change and I want to learn myself and I want to pull apart all the pain that I have and move

[01:12:15] ahead you never really going to get the result you'll find a reason not to continue it and then

[01:12:20] I think a lot of what I've learned on this conversation is so that you have to move beyond that

[01:12:23] barrier you have you have to move beyond the cobbibs like you said and kind of find a way towards

[01:12:30] being successful because and I love that part what you said all of us are already geniuses we're

[01:12:35] all these successful we just have to remove all the stuff that's blocking that out from us there's

[01:12:40] other questions I ask all my guests at the end and I do this because it's a good way to wind up

[01:12:44] every conversation what's your best and worst habit my best habit is I don't sleep with any grievances

[01:12:55] I make sure that I laugh a lot before I sleep because I know whatever goes for last in your mind

[01:13:01] will come first so life has become much better after I've trained myself to laugh more my worst habit

[01:13:09] is I would say I've got nowhere a lot of them but I would say still my worst habit is a lot of times

[01:13:16] when there are people around me I suddenly get this deepest urge to be alone don't we all

[01:13:25] and I get lost then in that case like if I find the conversations are not appealing to me I may be

[01:13:33] physically present there but I am mentally so I'm working on that habit not really

[01:13:41] master it yet so I use that like a safety mechanism for me it's amazing I'm like it's

[01:13:45] switch off anywhere in the world and I can do but I maybe I agree it's something to work on for sure

[01:13:50] what's the biggest indulgence I think my adaptability caution is very high

[01:13:57] do you have like a work uniform like if I dress like this then I'm like set for work

[01:14:04] yeah I hate it but I do it but you will often see me in places

[01:14:11] do you have anything which you've read anything which you consume lately that you'd recommend people

[01:14:15] should read people should watch yeah I love listening to different different podcasts I love

[01:14:20] particularly if in this subject you would say Andrew Joberman's podcast I love what it's a long

[01:14:25] podcast but every time it comes out I don't sleep without watching it so I would definitely recommend

[01:14:32] if someone wants to listen to that books I read a lot but

[01:14:42] anything to recommend right now it depends on you know there's this beautiful book called

[01:14:50] Shame that binds you okay and it talks about because I'm talking about this topic so I'm just

[01:14:56] gonna kind of talk about that what relevance to that is I think that helps you to realize that how

[01:15:01] the shame has shaped our life and how we have put ourselves in the box and how we are not achieving

[01:15:09] what we are capable of it's a big book so I'm very deep book so maybe and there's another book

[01:15:16] I would like to you know talk about is this my bedside book okay it's a version of Bhagavad Gita

[01:15:21] which is written by Paramahansa Yogananda which is talks about God talks to Arjun

[01:15:28] it's a two volume book and I have read it long back but what I do now is every day I just pick up

[01:15:36] any volume and I just turn a page and see what's my message for today so it's like Angel cards

[01:15:42] messages coming from Bhagavad Gita for me so there's a joke that comes up and that's a narration

[01:15:46] there's an explanation so I really love and I really feel that that book speaks to me so if

[01:15:51] anybody wants to kind of try your hands you can probably look at it's good to have a book like

[01:15:56] that kind of pick up and just yes yes as I almost like it's a great habit to actually have

[01:16:00] yeah I asked you earlier what pizza advice you would have for people but what is the best piece

[01:16:06] of advice you ever got the best piece of advice that I ever got is self care is most important

[01:16:16] because for me it was very important exercise because I'm born in a middle class family and when

[01:16:21] you see financial restrictions in family in terms of you don't have surplus of everything

[01:16:28] self care comes the last right so even when I started making money for me that concept was not

[01:16:34] there it was there was always something else important so it really had to train myself to

[01:16:43] take care of myself whether it is investing in a trainer investing in good food and I'm

[01:16:50] been candid here like it took me a while to kind of invest that money into myself care so that was

[01:16:59] the one best advice that I got from someone and said that you're hey you know what you will do

[01:17:04] everything for everybody else but when you're going to be old your body is going to be your best

[01:17:10] friend so what are you doing with that so I think that made a huge difference to me

[01:17:16] thank you so much for doing this has been amazing I think so much to learn so much to also absorb

[01:17:22] and I think we got some of the shocks that were needed to kind of also like really really think about

[01:17:29] all this stuff but thanks for doing this podcast and I hope this is almost the start of people's

[01:17:33] journey to understanding their own mind and and they're the connection to everything that they do

[01:17:38] in their life I love it thank you very much thank you so much

[01:17:46] you