In today’s digital age, genuine friendships can feel increasingly rare. Social media often fosters superficial connections, leaving many feeling isolated. This reflection emphasizes the importance of investing time and effort in meaningful relationships, encouraging us to reach out and engage in honest conversations. Let’s prioritize real connections and nurture the bonds that truly enrich our lives.
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[00:00:04] Hello Sunshine and how have you been? How has your week been?
[00:00:08] Today, with social media playing such a central role in our lives,
[00:00:14] there are more and more people actually finding themselves living isolated, lonely lives.
[00:00:20] It's getting that much more difficult for each of us to kind of connect.
[00:00:25] It's getting difficult for people to form genuine bonds, make great friends.
[00:00:32] And the other day, my colleague, who's now a friend, a very dear friend of many years,
[00:00:38] called me because she was completely heartbroken about a childhood friend who had grown distant.
[00:00:45] You know, she said she was my constant friend.
[00:00:48] We've grown up together. We went to school together.
[00:00:51] In fact, we were in the same school.
[00:00:53] Later, the college we went to was also right next to each other.
[00:00:58] We knew each other's entire families.
[00:01:01] We've cried together about heartbreaks and tragedies.
[00:01:04] We've jumped up with joy for each other when we had to celebrate our milestones and successes.
[00:01:11] But today, because of the hectic lives we live, we barely speak that much.
[00:01:16] She said, for a long time, I tried to manage my schedules according to hers
[00:01:20] and it got too busy and difficult after a while.
[00:01:23] We haven't fought at all.
[00:01:25] In fact, we send each other memes and reels and that's what it has come down to.
[00:01:31] I just feel that she was my constant.
[00:01:34] She was my go-to and I was hers.
[00:01:36] And today, it's nothing but a huge gaping void that I'm left with.
[00:01:41] The truth is, she said, it's difficult making friends when you're an adult.
[00:01:46] She admitted she was a part of book clubs, music clubs.
[00:01:50] She had even joined a couple of dance classes.
[00:01:53] But she was not able to maintain a deep bond with any of them.
[00:01:58] We speak about books and music.
[00:02:00] Whenever we're at the dance classes, we probably just have like very chirpy, cheerful conversations,
[00:02:05] but nothing real.
[00:02:06] It gets lonely, she said.
[00:02:09] I felt so bad for her that I quickly made plans to meet this sweet girl for lunch
[00:02:13] and a much-needed girly afternoon of shopping.
[00:02:17] Hopefully, she felt better.
[00:02:19] But it's what reality is currently.
[00:02:22] In this highly demanding world, it's very difficult to form deep meaningful bonds with others.
[00:02:29] Today, a lot of people don't feel the need to have even one friend
[00:02:33] because lives today are lived on social media.
[00:02:36] People are getting more comfortable with just interacting on social media
[00:02:40] and spending time alone.
[00:02:42] The whole point of showing up to meet someone,
[00:02:46] to be vulnerable,
[00:02:48] to having an honest conversation seems like a myth,
[00:02:51] almost like it never actually ever happened.
[00:02:55] And people are getting emotionally affected.
[00:02:59] Many don't have a single friend to count on
[00:03:02] because all our searches are done online.
[00:03:07] The truth is, it was never easy making friends,
[00:03:10] even before the pandemic.
[00:03:11] People keep blaming the pandemic for this lack of social life,
[00:03:14] but it was never easy making friends,
[00:03:16] even before the pandemic.
[00:03:19] And a lot of us actually struggle
[00:03:21] with trusting people and making friends and connections.
[00:03:25] And after the pandemic,
[00:03:27] the concept of me time or
[00:03:29] you people
[00:03:30] started getting glorified so much.
[00:03:34] Frankly, we started celebrating it.
[00:03:37] Is technology making us lonelier?
[00:03:40] And to top that,
[00:03:41] we are also operating within these strict compartments.
[00:03:45] Today, if you look around you,
[00:03:46] each one of us,
[00:03:47] or probably a lot of us,
[00:03:48] if not each one of us,
[00:03:49] has a friend to go to a concert to,
[00:03:52] a friend to discuss kitchen politics with,
[00:03:54] a friend to discuss office politics with,
[00:03:56] a friend to go to work with,
[00:03:58] a friend to go pub hopping with,
[00:04:00] a friend to go dancing with,
[00:04:02] a friend to go shopping with.
[00:04:04] And yes,
[00:04:05] maybe everyone is happy with these compartments,
[00:04:07] but it's really rare today
[00:04:09] to find someone who has a friend
[00:04:11] for all of these occasions.
[00:04:13] You know,
[00:04:14] it's great
[00:04:14] that we are able to spend time alone,
[00:04:18] that we've understood what it is like to be alone,
[00:04:20] but it's not healthy either,
[00:04:23] when we only end up spending time alone,
[00:04:25] all the time.
[00:04:28] If you look around,
[00:04:30] it's sad when you see people go out to restaurants.
[00:04:33] What they do at that time
[00:04:34] is take aesthetic pics of the food,
[00:04:36] aesthetic pics of the restaurant.
[00:04:38] They'll probably discuss the post,
[00:04:40] discuss the hashtags,
[00:04:42] discuss the captions.
[00:04:44] And that's the beginning of what we call a bond.
[00:04:47] The beginning and the end of what we call a bond.
[00:04:51] It's common these days to complain
[00:04:53] that friendships aren't what they used to be.
[00:04:55] And it's true.
[00:04:57] When you go to restaurants,
[00:04:58] you'll see it filled with people staring at their phones
[00:05:00] instead of actually having conversations with one another.
[00:05:04] The selfie culture has made narcissists out of all of us.
[00:05:09] All we care about is our image
[00:05:11] and how we come across to the world around us.
[00:05:16] It's sad that today's friendships
[00:05:17] are also conditional and transactional.
[00:05:22] Even the word friend has been transformed by social media.
[00:05:25] What is being friends with someone?
[00:05:27] What is it liking their post
[00:05:28] and maybe following them
[00:05:30] or having them follow you?
[00:05:33] And this leads to a lot of anxiety
[00:05:35] because friendship,
[00:05:37] interacting with human beings
[00:05:38] is actually on the decline.
[00:05:41] And it is technology to blame in a large way.
[00:05:45] Lasting bonds or genuine bonds
[00:05:48] are often made only when you actually make an effort
[00:05:50] to invest in that friendship,
[00:05:51] invest in that relationship.
[00:05:54] The more the genuine investment,
[00:05:57] the more the relationship will thrive.
[00:05:59] And the more you meet people
[00:06:01] and actually interact with them in an honest manner,
[00:06:04] the healthier you will be.
[00:06:07] Here's to each one of us
[00:06:08] actually making an effort this week
[00:06:10] to go out and meet that friend
[00:06:13] that you've been wanting to meet.
[00:06:14] Go out and have that conversation
[00:06:16] that you think you really need to.
[00:06:18] Go out and actually deal
[00:06:20] in an honest, authentic manner.
[00:06:23] Take good care of yourselves
[00:06:24] and we'll speak to you again next week.
[00:06:26] Bye for now.